#very important for dean&jack as well yes

[soullessjack]

he is so important to me

[wellofdean]

Don't you think Cas should care and interact with Dean emotionally in The Trap? Dean's mother died only Days ago, and Cas thinks he should be over it already?

Well, uhm. Yes? But I don't think he can at that moment. He is in love with Dean, and Dean has shut the door on him hard, and done so exactly when he is weakest, because he is just as bereaved as Dean is. Both of them are suffering, and neither of them can meet the others' needs. It's not like one of them is being the asshole, and the other one is blameless.

Dean's mother notably referred to Cas as 'one of her boys' and Cas notably saved her from death after Dean's deal with Billie because they all mean too much to him, including Mary. Cas loved and lost Mary, too. Cas loved and lost Jack, whom Cas saw as their child. And, Cas feels like he has also lost Dean!

Why are Dean's grief and Dean's sub-optimal emotional responses in the face of grief more valid than Cas's? I can't put it better than @deangirlism101 in their tags on this post, so I am just going to share them here:

#🤔 it's interesting how differently that ''you couldn't forgive me'' line felt to me#idk if it's because I'm approaching that line with the context that narratively#at least to me#these two are for all intents and purposes#quite married#in my mind the divorce arc is genuinely A Divorce#it's not a breakup. it's not a fight. it is a ''irreconcilable differences'' divorce#and that's where I'm approaching my reading of cas in that scene#it's very much that pragmatic side of divorce#where one partner reaches a point of shutdown because they believe there is no longer any kind of conversation to be had#''you cannot forgive me and i am unable to be near you while unforgiven'' is not#in my perception#the same as ''i apologized and therefore i deserve forgiveness''#i read somewhere that a big warning sign of divorce is contempt#and in the episodes prior to cas leaving#that is all dean expressed toward cas to his face#literally#dean's panicked ’'where are you going?'' i.e. the first noncontemptuous thing dean says to cas all season#is said to his back!#it's not that cas is owed forgiveness#it's that cas NEEDS forgiveness to be able to remain In The Relationship#the way i interpret it#cas isn't ASKING for forgiveness. he is just saying he needs it to stay#which to me is a world of difference#it's not out of entitlement#which i think is important for the emotional context of the episode#and i think it's the beauty of the divorce arc being very much a depiction of Marital Strife#to me it feels like an excellent depiction of the way a healthy marriage is deeply entrenched in compromise and not keeping score#(which is not to say it's okay for cas to continue going off on his own and keeping secrets)

I agree hard with everything here. And, I also think it's not only a depiction of Marital Strife, but a depiction of marital strife after the loss of a child, which is a whole other level of understandable not coping.

They are both on the ropes, they are both emotionally compromised in ways they aren't able to overcome. They both have Things They Routinely Do that are not for the best -- Cas tries to solve everything alone and keeps secrets, and Dean masks all his vulnerable feelings with anger. I think they both forgive the other, but can't bridge the gap. I think it's possible to love and forgive someone, and not be able to be around them, and I think Cas and Dean are both doing their best, it's just that, under the circumstances, their best is not great.

And, this bears repeating: #to me it feels like an excellent depiction of the way a healthy marriage is deeply entrenched in compromise and not keeping score

Cas is not owed an apology, but the fact that Dean can give one? I love that FOR DEAN.

[angelsdean]

Also, since I'm divorce arc posting today, what if i said Dean wasn't wrong to say this:

CASTIEL The plan changed, Dean. Something went wrong. You know this. Something always goes wrong. DEAN Yeah, why does that something always seem to be you?

LIKE !!!!! Sure it was harsh and if emotions weren't heightened already and Dean wasn't still dealing with the very recent death of his mother and that grief (anger being a stage of grief!) and ALL the Chuck shit on top of that AND his own complicated feelings re: Jack's death (bc Dean was Not going to kill him, despite Chuck trying to manipulate him into doing that) he probably wouldn't have said that to Cas but like?? he's not really wrong.

You can easily trace a lot of the major season conflicts as a long line of dominoes starting with Cas's s6 betrayal. Leviathans. Purgatory. The tablets. Angels falling. Lucifer getting out of the cage via Cas possession. Etc etc. And most of the time Cas was doing things from a place of good intentions in his POV. Trying to fix things or spare others the burden of doing the hard thing. But still, these plans often backfire for Cas. Going it alone, not letting Dean (+ Sam) in on his plans, it usually does not end well !!!! They are TEAM Free Will for a reason. The show (and Dean) continuously emphasizes the importance of team and family and not going it alone. So, while what Dean says to Cas in this scene is definitely a harsh pill to swallow and not something I think Dean would say to Cas in normal circumstances, he technically isn't wrong. And that's what makes it such a heart-breaking scene.

And even more-so, he's saying this but he still, at his core doesn't want Cas to leave. ("Of course I wanted you to stay.") At the moment he needs space and time to process his grief re: Mary, and all the other stuff going on, but he still wants Cas there and ultimately wants to fix things. ("I'd rather have you." "We can fix this." "I was there where were you." etc etc)

But to fix things they need to address his huge persistent, recurring issue between them: not communicating effectively and Cas continuously leaving, going rogue, and/or deciding for them when to involve Dean.

Dean wants to work together, as a team. Dean wants to be involved. Dean wants Cas to not just up and disappear and "deal with things" on his own like he always does. Cas, in his own POV, sees his actions as perhaps a form of care. He's protecting! He's taking on the hardships! Also, his hubris, wanting to be the strong protector type. Wanting to be a warrior. Powerful. Securing "wins." And these desires stem from his years as a soldier of Heaven, of equating worth with Results. Not something Dean has put on him or required of him.

But Dean doesn't see Cas's actions the way Cas perceives them. We as the omniscient audience know more about Cas's motivations than Dean does too. Dean often just sees Cas leaving, prioritizing the mission and shutting Dean out. However, I do think it's important to note that Dean is also usually willing to give Cas the benefit of the doubt, defend him, and forgives easily / implicitly.

They both care deeply about each other and don't maliciously mean to press on each other's specific insecurities and traumas but like, Dean is abandonment issues boy. And Cas keeps leaving. Or ignoring his calls when their daily lives are a constant life or death battle because they are literally living in a horror show! Dean is not unreasonable to be worried when he doesn't hear from Cas for days, weeks, months on end. He's not being "clingy" or "demanding." Expecting some base form of communication from the people you care about is normal in any relationship. Cas refusing to communicate in these moments IS a problem between them.

So, when Dean says, "Yeah, why does that something always seem to be you?" re: Cas being the "problem" it's harsh yes! But it's pushing them toward addressing this recurring issue (Cas going rogue often = plans backfiring) and the root of that issue which is Cas continuing to leave to do things on his own, change the game-plan without running it by anyone, and keeping others out. This moment is a breaking point. Because Dean, under normal circumstances, is generally one to defend, forgive, and move past Cas's mistakes. Cas himself says it in this very scene: "You used to trust me, give me the benefit of the doubt."

But at this point something needs to give, they need an explosive moment to just bring all these issues to light. It's a rupture.

Yes, Dean might "still blame [Cas] for Mary" but Cas also knows deeply, as he expresses to Jack, that Dean needs time and space to process his emotions. That he feels things more acutely and intensely but that ultimately he usually comes to a place of acceptance / forgiveness / is able to move on.

That's what Dean wants and needs in this moment. He needs space to deal with his feelings and his grief (clearly in the anger stage of it). And he also wants to finally address these issues! But Cas is also struggling himself and in his own mind he's feeding old insecurities. He let Belphegor get under his skin. He thinks he's not needed or wanted anymore. So, he does what he tends to do. Leave.

CASTIEL Well, I don't think there's anything left to say. [Castiel makes to leave.] DEAN Where you going?

Cas decides to leave and Dean immediately asks where are you going? Because even now, feeling how he does, he doesn't want Cas to leave.

What Dean wants is to have a confrontation. He wants to get to the root of their issues. He asks Cas why didn't he just stick to the plan. And emphasizes the concept of WE, of being a team. "We would've figured it out....after. With Rowena." He wants them to stick together, work together. But he's struggling. He's grieving. And still, he wants Cas to stay, of course I wanted you to stay.

And I say it all here in this post but the whole "I left but you didn't stop me" is just, Cas really? From Dean's POV he sees Cas's leaving as a choice Cas makes. He respects his choice and doesn't ask him to stay because he also does not feel he deserves to ask people to stay for him. He is always putting his own wants and desires second to those of others. He thinks, if Cas wants to leave, who is he to stop him?

Anyways, I think too much of divorce arc puts blame on Dean or makes Dean out to be "the bad guy" and "the reason" Cas leaves and the one who needs to "grovel" and apologize / be forgiven. But Cas is not blameless. Cas leaves because Cas leaves. Cas leaves because he chooses to and because he does not want to confront the realities of the situation or his own role in their issues. And after Cas leaves he continues to bury his head in the sand and be avoidant (thee core issue!) while also going out and working a solo case in an effort to secure a "win" and prove to himself that he's still capable of getting things right and not always failing.

And all of this, the complexity, the layers, Cas's stubbornness and flaws, is deeply delicious to me. Cas is not a blameless innocent little baby who got his feelings hurt by "big meanie Dean" in this situation. He is someone who heard a hard truth from someone he cares about and made the choice to leave instead of confronting the issue. And throughout it all, they both still deeply care about each other. It's evident in everything they do. And they want to work it out, but are both at different places and struggling with their own feelings too.

[beautysurvives]

jumping off of my last post about her, I think that the amara arc — as well as the carver era as a whole — has so much to do with dean’s loosely defined sexuality, and his struggles with both commitment and monogamy. In season 8, being with Benny while looking for Cas, season 9 working with Crowley, season 10 running away with Crowley —

and Crowley’s “pick a bloody side” “what are you? A demon or a human?” Qareen!Amara’s “who are you? You’re a mystery,” etc. The strong sexual undercurrents in all of these relationships point to a theme of sexual (and perhaps gender) ambiguity.

Dean’s apology to Cas at the end of s11 can also be read as an apology for his promiscuity and its contribution to their ambiguous relationship. His habit of handing over his body and soul to whoever is most powerful / most capable of providing safety to him and/or his loved ones, even if that is only temporary safety. He runs to whoever seems like the strongest and the most secure option.

It’s what he does at the end of season 4, when he hands himself over to Cas (and to Heaven). It’s what he almost does in season 5 when he tries to say yes to Michael (before Cas stops him by beating him into submission) — it’s what he does in season 6 by going to Lisa (because Cas didn’t immediately offer to stay with him). Season 8 with Benny (to save Cas from purgatory), season 9 with Crowley and Cain, season 10 with Crowley (and in both these seasons, Dean is feeling like he has to become independent from both Sam and Cas in order to make himself stronger). It’s why this is the habit he has to try so hard to resist in season 11. And he does give in to it at the end of season 13 with Apocalypse World Michael when Sam and Jack are taken by Lucifer. He even falls back on this habit again in season 15, by trusting Belphegor and scorning Cas for his relative ineffectiveness.

I think this is also part of why he thought it was okay or simply necessary to subject Sam to the same sort of treatment in season 9 with Gadreel. It’s not just that Dean himself is doing something to Sam in tricking him — it’s that (I think) this is part of Dean’s understanding of family dynamics (as someone who was denied his own bodily autonomy very early in life and quickly got used to offering his own body to the danger of the hunt).

Your family is also you. What has been done to you is also done to them and vice versa. Before Dean manipulates Sam into saying yes to Gadreel, Dean himself gets manipulated into saying yes. And he blames himself every time. Even saying yes to Alastair — even making that deal with the demon to save Sam in season 2 is a part of this.

I think it’s important to note that both Sam and Cas have their own patterns of being manipulated into giving away their bodily autonomy — but the circumstances differ. Dean is typically only after safety and security, he’ll say yes to whatever guarantees that he and/or his loved ones escape harm (even if it’s only illusory safety that’s being offered).

But for both Sam and Cas, the fantasy that they buy into usually involves them getting to be portrayed as a hero. For Cas, though he shares Dean’s same strong desire to protect himself and loved ones, he fights against that urge — I think he’s often leaning more toward the side of wanting to redeem himself to his family, while also earning the right to control them / decide what’s best for them.

For Sam, it’s about dominating both the narrative and the person who is offering help / trying to manipulate him — and even as he seeks to redeem himself to Dean, there is also often a competitive sibling rivalry element, in which Sam also strives to be both better than and not-reliant on Dean. Protecting Dean is, unfortunately, an afterthought, which is not to say that Sam is selfish, but that his goal oriented, single minded nature can render him unconscious of the harm he does to both himself and others.

[szilverer]

so, after a timely realization post-hallowmas,

reisz has officially joined the great hellbound railway's board! 🥳

...although. they did not think they'd be put in a position of power when they decided to invest contributing money from the sidelines. what do you mean reisz is on equal grounds with all these important people.? was it really that much money???

liveblog rambling about latest developments under the cut lol

wait, but the last i've updated of them they were still slowly dipping their toes into seeking and peckish enough to eat an entire clown car's worth of people! well, to sum it up, every addict has a wake-up call moment and reisz' came after the unexpectedly disturbing nightmare that left a little gift on their skin. reisz was not pleased by this in the slightest, but it's not like they immediately recognized it for what it was. they wanted to believe it was just a particular dream phenomenon, yeah, surely they'd be able to sneak away from it in parabola as always.

(this was when i realized the surprise benefit that was marrying them to edward-- i can use him as a plot device LMFAO. aight eddie i bet ya dont wanna become a widow while that moonmilk is still lingering so your job now is infodumping your clueless spouse every now and then. hence: )

after a little kidnapping, a frenzied feast of rubbery lumps and a bit of denial, reisz gets so goddamn pissed at the prospect of forever staining all their shirts (and their ivory gowl!!!) with blood that they quit seeking outright.

SIGHS.

so. that was that.

alas, after stitching themself up, reisz took up on an old invitation to concord square where some ppl (for some reason??) wanted to handle them the Jack case. considering reisz had already freed london of a menace of a man, sure, let's do it again.

it was there that they came across an invitation to the railway venture. once again, barely reading the details, they went headfirst into it. scrip? ya want scrip? i can get scrip stat. no idk what scrip is but i got it by accident when i sold some lab reports. hahaha yes im joking of course! of course.

reisz sacrifices 3 of their headless skeleton friends to the bone market the very next day (these being their first skelly dealings in that market ever...) and heads to the board. there were faces both old and new.

HAL - acquaintances, hadnt seen him in a while but had good times drinking before. fun company. alright.

The Efficient Commissioner - never seen before. (me, player: HIIIII HELLO FINALLYYYYYYY)

the board has reisz recommend choose a third member (why.) they only heard of Jenny way back in the waswood, and the last time they saw Feducci they had hacked him to pieces after a shared gaze of profound understanding that reisz didnt wanna think about, so... Jovial Contrarian my lad. come on over! we always chat at parties anyway!

reisz was immediately forced to go excavating to pay a bribe. off to a great start there. then the deviless reisz duped months ago invited herself over to the board and they sincerely hoped she had forgotten all that stuff about the stones.

finally, the church meddles in, and they have to choose between... a bishop they never heard about and the dean of xenotheology. they chose the dean solely bc she reminded them of Dr. Vaughan. (no, the bishop that edward kidnapped was never an option. he's one of the handful of people that know about the whole marriage thing so no way.)

this entire thing had barely started and it had already begun to give them a headache. reisz goes to sleep tired as all hell and is woken up at an equally unholy hour:

(cue me screaming bc i FINALLY get to meet this absolute celebrity. furnace the woman that you are. shes SUCH an interesting character right off the bat.)

reisz is not even close to being a political person -- they've been a red player through and through -- so they didnt particularly like the idea of being the bridge between the board and the union. it was to their relief that this furnace person seemed quite level-headed and someone they could personally get along. some good news, at least? (i am also very 👀 at the possibility of reisz actually giving a damn about a political faction in the future. lets see!)

now all the bureaucracy was out of the way, and the GHR can finally start laying the actual track! surely the other members are gonna make the arrangements soon, right?

...right...?

[nightwingsdiscordkitten]

So this is what I have so far on the Dean Winchester character analysis it's a bit all over because I wrote it while on the bud home but I'm writing it in a notebook of mine in a more clear and organized way then gonna re type it once I get it done

Also if you guys don't mind pls add your own character analysis of your own or just things you've noticed during the series because I really don't wanna mischaracterize him and accidentally make him into a complete different person especially since Dean's whole character is literally so important to me

Also I don't want anyone to think I'm gonna excuse the bad things Dean has done to Sam, Cas, and also Jack. I wanna include the fact that he isn't that great of a person and i still wanna hold him accountable for all the bad things he has done throughout the series

How Dean Winchester is. Given the parental role and also the more “women” or ‘feminin’ role in the series and also by the fandom.

Firstly we will talk about the fact that from a very young age (four years old) when his mother died in the fire he was the one to grab Sam from his crib and ran out of the house while his father stayed back. We see this in the very first episode and was also mentioned in one of the later seasons, growing up he was given the parental role because John (the father) was to busy with ‘grieving” his dead wife to the point that he threw himself and his family into the hunter life leave Dean and Sam to grow up on the road with no real home, they stayed in dirty old motels and barely had money to live off of, you can see this by the fact that they never had Christmas and I know that’s not a very ‘big deal’ BUT the fact that Dean had to sneak off and steal from a random home to give Sam some type of Christmas and also the fact that Dean was arrested for stealing some peanut butter bread and then was sent to Sunny’s home or wayward boys. There was also hints that Dean barley ever got to eat and often have his food to Sam so he wouldn’t go hungry at night, I don’t know if it was ever actually mentioned but it was hinted in episodes where Dean would have flashbacks or it was hinted, you can also notice this with how Dean eats his food, it’s more animalistic and rushed while Sam eats more calmer and also less, that is because Sam never had to really worry because Dean always fed him but Dean never knew when his next meal was so I believe it is a trauma response. Another trauma response is also is his savior complex, in the show we often see Dean more concern for Sam then himself and and could also be a readily for his own self destructive tendencies but we’ll talk about that later- since Dean has taken care of Sam his whole life Dean took on the parental role naturally and also started to relaty on Sam to be there constantly because Sam is his only constant figure in his life much how Dean is Sam’s only constant figure as well. Why is Sam and Dean each others only constant figure even tho they both have John tho? Well that is because John wasn’t the parental figure they needed. They only could rely on each other and no one else, sure they had Bobby but they don’t show him much in their flashback so I don’t know how much of a role he had in their childhood because he only really shows up more in their adult life, I do belive Bobby was there in their childhood because we see Bobby and Dean playing catch in season 7 when Bobby dies but that’s pretty much the only scene we get with Bobby and younger Dean every other scene is when Dean is a adult, so that makes me belive even more that Sam was deans only constant and the same with Dean for Sam. Now, about the savior complex, there are multiple examples of Dean wanting to risk his life for same and wanting to ‘save’ Sam for example

•Dean welling his soul in season 1 to same Sam

• Dean wanting to save Sam from ruby and his demon blood addiction

•Dean wanting to say yes to Michel

•Dean trying to get rid of the mark of Cain

•Giving himself up to Amra

•Even giving his own childhood up for Sam

Etc (look up more of deans self scarification)

We also see Deans self destructive tendencies by the fact he pushes people away, him being a alcoholic, him hiding his own traumas and emotions resulting him to have break downs or out bursts of rage because that was what he grew up on. He never learned how to let his anger out in normal healthy ways I believe that was because of John and how he was raised because we constantly see John being abusive and taking his anger out of Dean.

Again this is super all over the place but that’s because it’s still the rough draft I’m planing on rewriting all of this to make more sense and also I still wanna add more things to this as will because There’s so much more I wanna talk about but just can’t put it in words exactly

[scoobydoodean]

I see this held up as major proof of Dean's badness, but couldn't it also be proof of Cas having faith Dean can get past anything without Cas having to change his behavior? The way it's structured the onus is on DEAN to work through it, not others to change or make amends. ---- CASTIEL: You know, Dean, he – he feels things more acutely than any human I've ever known. So it's possible he could work through this. One day, he may explode and let it all out and breathe deeply and move on.

I see what you mean in a general sense, and it's extremely possible that Cas is thinking about his own past fights with Dean and Dean forgiving him, and from the perspective of the critique you have in mind that you're refuting, I agree. But of course deancrit casgirls will forever insist that Cas has never in his life done anything harmful to Dean either accidentally or on purpose, so any time Dean might dare try to hold him accountable for anything, he's actually just making shit up and being toxic and controlling, so here Cas is just apologizing for his own abusive relationship. You can only get their take by being deliberately obtuse/disingenuous.

That said, the context of that line (from 15.13 "Destinty's Child") is Cas answering soulless Jack's question about whether Dean will eventually forgive him for murdering Mary.

CASTIEL: Hey, Jack. JACK: Cas, you know what's good about being dead? CASTIEL: Uh, as I recall, very little. JACK: Well, when you come back, you – you really get into all that life is. Hot, cold, sweet, spicy, funny, scary. CASTIEL: And are you? "Into it"? JACK: I want to be. But I don't... feel things the way I used to. Before I lost my... CASTIEL: Your soul. JACK: I used to feel things. In my bones. It was glorious, and sometimes unbearable. But I felt them. Now, I understand joy or sadness, but... I know those things aren't in me. I understand why Sam and Dean were angered by what happened to Mary... CASTIEL: By what you did to Mary. JACK: Yes. I see that I've caused them pain. And it's clear that things have changed. Especially with – with Dean. Will he ever forgive me? CASTIEL: You know, Dean, he – he feels things more acutely than any human I've ever known. So it's possible he could work through this. One day, he may explode and let it all out and breathe deeply and move on. JACK: How long will that take? CASTIEL: I don't know.

And yeah—I have seen people refer to Cas's little speech here as "condoning child abuse" and other bullshit. Because how DARE Dean not forgive soulless Jack for murdering his mother (something soulless Jack is unable to actually really acknowledge he did). I mean clearly any time someone murders your mom because she made them mad and threatened their sense of security by asking if they're okay and saying their concerning actions can’t stay a secret… That’s just natural understandable stuff! You need to forgive the person who murdered her instantly and if you don’t idk you’re kinda overreacting don’t you think? :/ I mean your mom probably deserved it kind of anyway for reading the room so wrong and talking about getting a person help. And I mean if you don't forgive the person who killed your mom or do anything trying to stop them from hurting more people you're really a child abuser... toward an adult... who murdered your mother in cold blood and is unable to even understand why it was wrong in any sense other than an intellectual one like he read it from a book... preferring to refer to it as "What happened to Mary" instead of acknowledge it as something he himself did because he was mad and felt threatened—which is what he circled back to in "Jack In The Box" too. It's only when Jack gets his soul back that he's able to actually feel true empathy, acknowledge his real actions and the gravity of them, and give an actual sincere apology. Because his soul is actually important—something this fandom refuses, by and large, to notice.

Anyway, this fandom's take on Mary's murder and soulless Jack vs. regular Jack is overwhelmingly a bag of wet third grader vomit and feces so what can one expect?

[eisforeidolon]

So on the subject of John supposedly being an alcoholic [X], let's talk about what evidence there actually is in the canon that references his drinking.

In the pilot, Sam makes two quick references to John drinking - "he's probably working overtime on a Miller shift" and he's hunting deer at a cabin with "Jim [Beam], Jack [Daniels], and Jose [Cuervo]". Except taking that as evidentiary is ignoring the very obvious and important context that he says those things in front of and directly to Jessica, respectively. It's a very neatly normal explanation to give her for why Dean might not want to talk in front of her (about embarrassing family problems) and why Sam would be worried enough to take off in the middle of the night. John's not a monster hunter, he's an alcoholic on a bender with guns! When Jessica isn't in the room, the conversation becomes all about hunting, with no mention of alcohol - even when Sam is bringing up John's previous disappearances and questionable parenting choices? It's no longer part of the conversation.

The next obvious reference is Nightmare, where the quote is, "We're lucky we had Dad. [...] Well, it coulda gone a whole other way after Mom. I little more tequila and a little less demon hunting and we woulda had Max's childhood. All things considered, we turned out ok. Thanks to him." I think we can take this one at face value since there's no outside audience, but what does it really say? Definitively that John was less of an abusive drunk than Max's father, though that doesn't say hardly anything at all considering what it would take to be worse. Presumably that Sam & Dean were aware of John drinking at least sometimes to some extent, though "a little more/a little less" is pretty euphemistic in this context. Anything beyond that is putting a lot of mileage onto a pretty vague statement.

Another comment that isn't for an outside audience you could take to be about drinking is in Dark Side of the Moon, where Sam is talking about his "first real Thanksgiving" and when Dean says they had Thanksgiving every year, Sam dismissively says "We had a bucket of extra-crispy and Dad passed out on the couch." Sam is pointedly making a comparison between a big family togetherness meal at a table and the Winchesters getting a takeout bucket of chicken in whatever dodgy motel room with no especial fanfare. While I think it's not an unreasonable assumption to make that John was passed out after drinking, it is an assumption - alcohol isn't mentioned. Sam could be referring to him taking a nap on his day off from hunting rather than bothering to do anything special - Sam would clearly be disappointed in the lack of Normal Family Traditions either way (if he was yearning enough to enjoy someone else's big family Thanksgiving as a particularly happy memory). Even if John was drunk, we're talking about behavior on a holiday specifically about family togetherness in a broken family. Bad judgement? Yes. Alcoholic? Trickier question.

The last one I can think of/track down is in The Girl Next Door. It does explicitly talk about John drinking. When flashback!Amy is concerned about her mom's possible reaction to a minor spill, "Yeah, well, she has a temper. Sometimes. It's... no big deal." Flashback!Sam replies with, "My dad does, too. You don't want to see him when he's drinking." While I think Sam is clearly smitten with her and wants to relate to her? He doesn't have the same kind of need to lie and prevaricate in this situation as he did with Jessica. So I think we can safely say Sam has seen John drinking and that he sometimes has a temper when he does. How often that happens, though, and how much drinking is involved? Well, again, those are not details we can get from the text without adding a fair bit of interpretation in one direction or the other.

Are there any big obvious ones I'm missing? Or even smaller ones? It's been a while since my last rewatch and I just don't know the final few seasons very well.

Look, I'm not nominating John Winchester for Father of The Year. He's a complex and conflicted character with some clear faults who makes mistakes (just like his sons). It's one thing to recognize that - or to just dislike him! It's another thing to treat headcanons based on a few vague implications as canonical fact.

[ananke-xiii]

From Epic to Tragedy to ... Epic, I guess? Or why Supernatural Season 6 is the most important season of all (pt 1).

Do I have your attention? Yes, good. But just so you know it'll be long and in installments and maybe it makes sense or maybe not.

Yes, I know the title is a tiny bit incendiary but I promise I have a point to make.  

So, my idea: I posit that SPN S1-5 are inherently an epic narrative with a tragic tone while S6, in an unexpected turn of events, heavily shifts the show towards a tragic narrative with an epic tone. S6 creates a great divide within the narrative itself that the show is ultimately unable to resolve. On one hand Sam will “carry on” the epic narrative, on the other Castiel will “swan dive” to his (many) tragic endings. S8-11 arc correctly identifies Dean as the character who's able to mitigate the divide and bring the two narratives together. However, the pervy obsession Chuck has with Deanthe show simply refuses to do so, consequently S12 introduces Jack (as an absent character but we already know from S11 The Mother as an Archetype is now alive and well in the unfridged Mary so the emergence of The Son is something clear from the very ending of the previous season) as the character most likely to resolve the narrative. However, S13-15 arc fails because it wants to do too many things at the same time. The "funny" thing is that, as a result, all characters just seem to be extremely tired of The Journey, The Quest, the obstacles, they all start screaming "Catharsis!" but it's still not given to them (hello Chuck!). By the time Cas makes the deal with The Empty the audience feels the impending tragedy and it's partially given to them, although... The show doesn't mend "The Rupture" between the two narratives, Cas dies as a tragic hero, Sam as an epic hero and Dean and Jack will remain in their limbo (a limbheaven, I guess? lol) but in substantially different positions. I personally think that this is what led to the audience’s conflicted response about the finale: ultimately the scale was tipped off in favor of the tragic narrative but the audience was eventually given the epic narrative ending.  

Premise: this is my very first attempt at writing what in my mind, I hope, will turn out to be an analysis, a meta if you will, about Supernatural. I stand on the shoulders of giants and I myself am a microscopic ant but, you know, there’s room for everyone even for a little ant like me. I want to write down my thoughts and share them with strangers on the internet because 1) if I keep all my ideas trapped inside my head I’ll explode; 2) writing them down helps holding my spiraling mind down; 3) I thrive when people listen to my convoluted thoughts and share their opinions and we all have heated chats and sometimes I end up hating those people because they’re right but also I fall in love with their minds lol.  

Finally, please just remember that I’m also just a girl, sitting in front of a laptop, asking you to not come at me.

Part 1: Or where I posit that SPN s1-5 are inherently an epic narrative with a tragic tone…

Tell me, O Muse, of the man of many devices…

After the Pilot, the first SPN episode starts with two guys playing a videogame. One tells the other that he’s cheating; the other replies that he’s just smart. Interesting. The third guy we see (Guys! Guys! Guys!) is sending a video to his girlfriend and oh, look! He’s reading “The Hero with a Thousand Face” written by Joseph Campbell.

In less than 10 seconds the show is literally telling us everything we need to know: we’re dealing with Young Males, An Adventure, Trials, Obstacles… and with the completion of the journey (just like the videogame: overcome all your obstacle until you win). Basically, the show is an epic narrative. More specifically, it’s an epic narrative like The Odyssey. Well, actually, no. It’s more like The Telemachy. The Telemachy is the first 4 books of the Odyssey where Telemachus leaves Ithaca for the first time to look for his Absent Father. Sounds familiar? By the way, to this day I can’t help but feel deep admiration when I realize that The Odyssey is the story of The Absent Father and it starts off… precisely with his absence! Just like Supernatural, LOL.

Necessary aside: as if this was not already enough S10E5 Fan Fiction gifts us with what I find is the most brilliant meta ever metaed on SPN (and no, I’m not talking about the fan fiction part). In this episode we find out that the MOTW is… *drums roll* CALLIOPE!!! The muse who presides over EPIC POETRY! And she wants to EAT The Author (and, in hindsight the fact that the Real Author is God… I mean, possibly Calliope was THEE monster that they really shouldn’t have killed lol). As if this was not enough… Maggie hits Calliope with… The Odyssey! Robbie Thompson was VIBING when he was writing this episode, I’m telling you!

Okay so now going back to my main point. Supernatural epic has a very distinct tragic tone. The Absent Father does return like Odysseus (end of S1) but he can’t stay (beginning of S2): in order for the Adventure to continue The Father must die (unlike the Odyssey where Father and Son unite to defeat the enemy and Return to The Ordinary World Together). After all, this is not The Odyssey, it’s The Telemachy where The Hero is not The Father but The Son.

So know let’s talk about The Son. The Epic Hero in Supernatural is Sam Winchester. He’s the one marked at birth by the story, aka The Special Kid with Psychic Powers of S2. This is the second half of the “Challenges and temptations” phase of the Hero’s Journey culminating with The Revelation and the subsequent Death&Rebirth. Sam will have to go through this cycle a lot because his own role commands it. He has to face the Abyss and then come out of it otherwise the story can’t progress. Occasionally, he’ll have to step outside the Special World into the Ordinary World (The Normal Life) even though he has not completed all the stages because the story needs to reboot and if The Hero goes back to the Ordinary World having completed all the stages then the story is over. This is why after 15 (FIFTEEN!) season it might feel (or, as I should say, I feel because people here largely disagree) that Sam’s arc is.. well, not exactly something that varies over time. It’s not the character’s fault: he’s just drawn that way (because the show refused to let go of this trite and old Hero’s Journey cycle but this is a topic for another time, hello Chuck, ya basic!). So Sam, The Son. S3 Sam faces the challenges of possibly losing his brother so The Quest is trying to save Dean. Of course, this won’t happen (as previously stated, Sam needs a continuous Quest because he’s an Epic Hero) so we’re back at square one in S4-5 with the demon blood, the 66 sigils and, ultimately, Lucifer and the apocalypse.

Sam is the Epic Hero, special by birth, called back to the Adventure by his brother, quick learner, intelligent and warrior-like, overcomer of obstacles, trials and (maybe to a lesser degree lol) temptations and capable of facing the Abyss. I like the fact that he's definitely not The Perfect Hero because his many flaws make him more compelling and fascinating. Speaking of flaws, there's one thing that Sam lacks. Sure, like all characters on every TV show he has a need, a desire AND a fatal flaw. However, there is a fatal flaw and THE fatal flaw: hamartia.

Hamartia is the tragic flaw, the character's very own trait that brings about his very own downfall. How do we know that Sam lacks this very specific trait? Because he never experiences utter and total ruin brought about by his and his own only hands.

However, there is a certain character, the one and only character that dares to "make it up as [he goes]", that committs a huge mistake, and he errs not because of some events, not because of some circumstances, possibly not even because of God's will: he just makes decisions that trigger cosmic consequences...

I wonder who could it be...

[quietwingsinthesky]

Let Jack do some biting and exploding as a little treat. He needs it for enrichment in his environment! Alternatively this is his “hormone driven teen age rebellion/angst” phase. Or he’s threatening to run away and live with Sam.

Assuming you’re referencing my anti-domestic destiel au: yeah 🥰 jack is in just the worst situation here, and he put himself there, sure, he agreed to it, thought it would be okay. but crucially, to me, he also thought it was temporary. and that the love he would experience as Dean & Cas’s actual baby wouldn’t differ that much from what he gets as himself. And when it actually is different, when they treat him different, (maybe there’s more kindness in Dean when he’s holding someone that looks more like a child, maybe Castiel’s more attentive and knows how to handle him better because after all, he planned, he took classes, for a baby) that’s rough! horrible and frustrating!

and since they’re all pretending this is fine and makes them happy, he spends more time than he should playing along and feeling worse and worse about himself. I think things should start breaking around him. His toys all crack and twist into terrible shapes. Blood stains show up on his baby blankets. He cries and glass shatters. (He’s trying so hard to keep it in, but it’s not working, he’s upset and he doesn’t even have an outlet to talk about it or anything because Dean and Cas are fully treating him like the toddler he’s taken the shape of.)

I really think Sam would be his saving grace here because Sam is a reprieve from having to keep up that appearance and act. Sam treats Jack as his son, yes, but also as an adult, because that is what Jack is, fast growth cycle and odd birthday count or not. He doesn’t want to be a child. The window for that has passed. He’s grown up.

(I swear that Jack’s part in this isn’t just me being frustrated with his literal infantilization in popular fanon as a character who’s very obviously (to me, anyway) coded as autistic. I swear. It’s not all that. Just. Most of it.)

Jack running away with Sam would be such a way to kick off the falling apart of this “perfect” life that Dean and Castiel have constructed. Their son up and fucking leaves, goes to live with Sam because he can’t stand how neither of them look at him and actually see who he is rather than who they’d prefer him to be. Maybe jumpstarts a few realizations about the fact that they aren’t seeing each other truthfully either, that they’re both miserable and need to split up before they lose their friendship that’s so important to them as well.

(and of course, for extra drama, Jack should burn their house down. What better way to signify that the Normal Apple Pie Life is coming to an end then a housefire. Dean walks in to check on Jack during the night and instead of a baby, there’s Jack standing there next to his small bed, eyes burning gold and neither of them can say anything before the whole room explodes into flame. (Which Jack is very upset about. He didn’t mean that to happen. (He’s glad that it did.) He just lost control.)

but also just in general even outside of this au, jack should be allowed to bite people <3 it’s good for him <3 he gets his bloodthirsty urges to tear out people’s throats from his dad! (sam)

[echoes-lighthouse]

Bananas and Lychees for the general selfship asks please!

Haha YES thank you Emile <3 ^-^

Here's the ask game if other people want to reblog it but I THINK I've actually gotten every single thing asked to me already!! I just have to make my way through my inbox!

lychees ✦ do you use self-shipping to explore dynamics that you otherwise wouldn't in real life? if so, what dynamics (if you're willing to tell)? do you use self-shipping to imagine things you do want to experience in real life?

Little bit of both! I use my selfshipping 90% as escapism: usually that's higher-energy dynamics that I just don't have energy for in real life. Me and my IRL partner are very homebound due to mental and physical disabilities so even a lot of my positive selfships are like... not things that I currently want because I know they would just exhaust and hurt me lol

And then of course I do have darker ships where I specifically explore dynamics I would never want in real life, where communication is shut down and one person has all the power, or it's a constant struggle between us for domination. None of which I would ever want: I am very concerned about comfort in my real relationships (both my own and my partners') and I literally have never skipped a chance to over-communicate.

The only place in my selfships where I feel like I really am exploring something that I want is in some of the specific non-sexual kink dynamics that I have with some of my f/os: it's something that I haven't had for a while and I would really like to have again with a platonic partner in kink.

bananas ✦ do you have any ships unrelated to self-ship?

BOY DO I!!!

Shipping is literally soooo important to me as a person and has been for a lot of years: I recently made a top 100 ships list (and I'm almost done moodboards for each one) and I'm going to expand it to a top 200 ships list as well!!!

If anyone wants to hear about MORE of my ships or why I ship them or anything like that then you can so totally hit me up, but here is my top ten list!!! (under a readmore for people who don't like canon shipping)

I made this list based on the idea of 'what dynamic I'll never be tired of: if I was going to read a new AU or fic idea, which pairing would I like to read it about?'

ECHO'S TOP TEN ALL TIME SHIPS

10: Spock/Kirk (Star Trek)

9. Jack/Bitty (Check Please!)

8. Holmes/Watson (Every Source)

7. Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens, book version)

6. Rey/Kylo (Star Wars)

5. Lan Zhan/Wei Ying (The Untamed/MDZS)

4. Charles/Erik (X-Men Movies)

3. L/Light (Death Note)

2. Skulduggery/Valkyrie (Skulduggery Pleasant)

Dean/Castiel (Supernatural)

(yes, my shipping taste in my top-tier tends to be very basic and match AO3 trends, because the more content I consume about a ship, the more I ship it! So it's rare for rarepairs to get up in those high brackets for me, but you can tell how much I LOVE them when they do get up there: looking at you, Valduggery)

[bistrocule]

[ ↑ We make our own pixel art, you should request some ↑ ]

Collective name is SOA, collective pronouns are it/its and he/him [and any alternative spellings of he/him: hy/hym(n), hx/hxm, etc.], NO they/them and NO it&/you& type pronouns. Also, masculine terms, and the most important blacklist, NO human terms.

We are a bunch of Bistro Huddy fictives. This blog is not limited to Bistro Huddy, we just wanted our own group blog, to get away from main, I guess? I don't know, I wasn't consulted. [-Terry]

We don't have a DNI, but we'll say BYF we're pro-endo and there's a lot of NSFW and gore here. Also if we're on your DNI and you follow us, we will softblock you, but we still don't care if you interact outside of following.

You should read this fanfic and check out @bistrohubbies [the author, they're really cool and make awesome fanart] [-Terry+Avery]

Headmate list and tagging system under the cut.

[ Name - emoji - pronouns - gendered terminology - age ]

-- Terry Alderidge - 🐻 - he/it - masculine - 46-54 - Also goes by Teddy and Sparrow. Used to have the names Scott Spruce and Gilbert Douglas, but I went back to Terry [and took my wife's last name]. - Married to Rosalie. - Described by wife as a "sexy Southern sadistic sodomite" and a "cute cuddly cannibal". Which people seem to enjoy. [-Terry]

-- Clary - 🎆 - they/them - feminine + neutral - 23 - Transfemme non-binary fictive of the mixologist. - Fun fact: They hastily chose the name Clary as an alternative spelling of our ship name, clerry. They thought they would change it later, but they turnt out to actually like it. [-Terry]

-- Rosalie Alderidge - 🍓 - she/her - feminine - 29-34 - Rosie, Rose. - Previously Beau (he/him). - Fictive of Brad. - Married to Terry. - Look at her art.

-- Ezra Owens - 🍾 - he/him - masculine - 26 - Fictive of Clint, the mixologist. - The hottest, conventionally speaking.

-- Nicole - 🎇 - she/hxr - feminine - 26 - That's she/her and shx/hxr, to be clear. - Fun fact: She's the one that made this blog. The icon is hxr personal icon; the original username was bistrosapphic. That changed very quickly. [-Terry]

-- Pickles - 🥒 - he/they/it - masculine + neutral - 22-25 - Fun fact: 'Secretly' his 'real name' is Dean. For some reason. It's an exomemory, but they don't know why.

-- Nico - 🧇 - he/it - masculine - 28 - I'm only assuming he uses masculine terms... I have no idea how we even know he's 28... he hasn't filled out PluralKit or Simply Plural... [-Terry]

-- Joey Cattaneo - 🥩 - he/she/ask - see below - 26 - he/him, she/her, choose one, alternate, doesn't matter - Alternative spellings as well. shx/hxr, hx/hxm, hy/hym(n) - Yes: Man, girl, dad, father, girlfriend, wife, spouse, nonna, feminine and neutral appearance descriptors [pretty, beautiful, cute, etc.] - No: Woman, boy, mom, mother, boyfriend, husband, handsome, bigender. - Very canon-divergent, but still very source connected. - Married to Trick and Avery.

-- Trick Cattaneo - 🧨 - he/it/xy - masculine - 29-31 - xy/xym/xys/xymself [pronounced he/him] - Trick is canonically short for Patrick. Do not call him that. - Married to Joey and Avery.

-- Avery Dean-Cattaneo - 🐄 - he/it - masculine - 26 - Fictive of Terry. - Married to Joey and Trick.

We're all dating, hence the bistrocule. Except Pickles isn't dating Clary or Nicole.

---

There are also some that will not be active. Including Taylor and the kids.

-- Taylor - 🍹 - he/him - masculine - 28 - Fictive of Clint, again. - He may be mentioned, but he left front immediately. [-Terry]

-- Benjamin Jackson Alderidge - 🐐 - he/him - masculine - Benji or Jack. - Parents are Terry and Rose. Terry carried.

-- Bellamy Rose Alderidge - 🫐 - she/her - feminine - Bella, Bell/Belle, Bee - Parents are Terry and Rose. Rose carried.

-- Laurence Cattaneo - 🪬 - he/him - masculine - Parents are Joey and Avery + Trick. Joey carried. - Twins with Laurel.

-- Laurel Cattaneo - 🫒 - she/her - feminine - Parents are Joey and Avery + Trick. Joey carried. - Twins with Laurence.

Rosie and Terry plan to have more kids, and Trick plans to have kids with Joey and Avery. So, there will be more.

We tag 'nsfw' but not 'nsft'. Could be a wide range of things, just as on SOoC.

We will, however, also separately tag 'gore' if that comes up. When it does, it's usually of the sexual nature in some way.

'oh lookie! an ask!' -> Ask post tag

'context now included!' -> When we reblog @syscord-out-of-context posts with the context. Also used for things we've submitted to culture-is or similar blogs.

// text // -> Tagged commentary, slashes are a visual indicator. This started on SOoC.

Name (pro/nouns) -> The headmate making the post, including on reblogs, for commentary tags or our own future reference.

-- Coming to you live from XX Month 2025! -- -> When tagged commentary was added at a date later than the post was initially made.

'formaledecore' + 'forestcore' -> For friends of ours. Alternative to @ tagging their blogs in every post.

'bistro huddy' tag will only be used for fandom posts, not for posts just talking about being fictives from it.

'character: name' and 'ship: name x name' for Bistro Huddy fandom posts.

'rebagel' is for 'self' reblogs. May or may not be the same individual, but, reblogging this blog back to this blog. Does not include culture-is submissions, posts from other blogs like SOoC, or posts that we have previously participated in but at root are not ours.

'bistro.txt' -> Original posts. Non-reblogs. Not always 'text' but, we don't care.

'bistro.png' → Original art posts. Only art, not just images. Mostly pixel art.

[zepskies]

Aww thank you, lovely friend!! 🥹💕 I tried my best to end this series with a bang lol, but also in a hopefully satisfying way that ties up the most important loose ends. I canNOT wait to dive into your thoughts on the grand finale!!

well, what a start! the action scenes were playing so vividly in my head, i loved all the details <3 and mato being a good son-in-law! love to see it 🤣

Ooh I'm so glad the action was gripping and vivid enough for you!! I don't love writing action scenes because it can be a lot of moving parts, but I try my best to make sure certain details stick out. And yesss Mato is on his A game now actually working with Dean! loll

felt a variety of emotions with this lol. sammy!!! i had a feeling he'd hear the commotion, so glad he's back!💓 (by now i think i've established my love for sam pretty well. 😂) i felt a bit confused too because cas what are you doinggg 😩 hopefully playing chess or something. 🤔 and it makes me sad that sam lost his hat, but his horse!!🥺 i'm not sure if it was his personal horse (like dean's baby) or not, however they shared a journey together :') wherever he ended up, i hope he's alright 💕

Oh I don't blame you loll. 😅 The "wtf?!" feeling with Cas was very intentional, even with the "yay!" of Sam being back in the game (even though he lost his hat and horse 🥲). But your instincts are right -- both of them were definitely playing chess on that one. I'm actually glad you wondered if it was Sam's personal horse because it's a thought I had and wondered if I should include that detail. In my head it wasn't his personal horse, but like you said, still a horse he shared a journey with. 💙 Though I also didn't specify this in the chapter, Cas/the soldiers took possession of Sam's horse, but he got him back afterwards (in the aftermath of it all).

phew 😅 also i cannot stop picturing the colonel from kfc every time sanderson gets mentioned 😭 white suit and all, the image won't leave my head loll

ahahaha yesss that's exactly what I was picturing, with Asmodeus's punk ass. 😂😂

absolutely beautiful <3 may he rest peacefully :(

Aw thank you for highlighting that line and Tahatan's dying words -- def one of my favorite lines for this entire series honestly.

i still don't like him but i will admit, this made me chuckle a little 😂 i really feel for mila and her people. it's just so unfair to be uprooted from your home like that :( and of course that grimy gremlin would go back on his word. the anxiety of it all 😩

Otaktay's redemption arc is slow on this one lol but I liked giving him that throwaway line. 😂

Oh yes, I drew historically from the "Trail of Tears" in American history, where the Native Americans/Indians were forced from their lands and they had to travel onwards to find new territory. It's a dark time that tends to be glossed over.

Yuuup gotta have our "bad guy goes back on his word" moment! 😅 If you've ever seen the movie Prince of Egypt, it's like that moment when the Jews are being chased after by the Pharaoh Rameses after he initially released them from slavery.

awwwww hell yeah i know that's right dean!!!😭🤍

hahaa YES! Dean's made his choice. 😌

ah yes that delicious pre-established relationship danger and peril angst, my hearttt 🥺 i love them sm<3

That moment where there's no time for goodbye, knowing you mind not see your loved one again. 🥲

i will admit this made me giggle 😭 I'm so sorry dean lmaoo :') the fight scenes were so cool though!! again, very vivid in my mind. didn't expect the otaktay save, but i'm glad he's gained some sense. and oh jack, i am glad he was spared but he fr just needs to distance himself from the colonel and his bs 🤠

ahaha I thought it was kinda funny too, ngl. 😂 Aw yay!! I'm so glad you enjoyed the fight scenes and that they felt vivid in your mind! Otaktay did step up, didn't he? Some new respect is brewing between him and Dean (finally), and you're very right loll. Jack just needs to go home and start a new life. Same with Cas and Benny tbh. 🥲

this was so cute 🥺 i was worried for her, but once again we see she's just as strong as she is stubborn loll

Oh yeah, Mila's still as tenacious and stubborn as ever! lol Pregnant ladies still kick ass, amirite? 😘

period benny. goodbyeeeeee and good riddance colonel 💅🏽 Šóta choosing peace was so mature of him, i'm glad he's not being so hotheaded anymore. completely understandable though given all that has happened.

Right?!! 😂 Begone, bitch~

And Šóta is finally maturing -- his father's death hit him hard, and he's learning what it takes to be a true leader. 💜

crying. just the sweetestttt 💞💞 to no one's surprise, i'm so glad sam decided to stay longer 🤣💗 given the circumstances i'm not sure how often he would be able to visit once he returns to his city civilian life, but at least for now he gets to spend time with his brother and good people -- family :3💘

Sam wants to stay with his bro as long as possible now that he's found him, especially for his nephew's birth. 🥹 And for that reason too (not knowing if he'll be able to visit again, or if so, how often). Family indeed! 💞💞

this had me meltinggggg 💓 they're going to be the sweetest parents. they're already so sweet to each other, i can't 🥺

You know, I did intend to stop here with Mila and Dean, but maaaaybe I'll have to come back to see how they're doing as parents and pillars of their tribe. 😏💓

sobbing. i love them so much, this was the most beautiful ending 💕 another wonderful series zep!!🤍:)

Omg thank you so much, Julia!! You don't know how wonderful it's been to get your support on this very niche little series that I didn't know if anyone would even want to read. 🥹 I always appreciate your input, but especially on The Honorable Choice/Outlander series. 💕

Outlander - Part 4

Pairing: Dean Winchester x OFC 

Summary: Dean Winchester has been stripped of his military rank, but he’s living happier with his new wife, trying to adjust to a new life in her tribe. What will it take for her people to accept him, especially when the battle for her heart might not be completely won? 

AN: Happy Birthday, Dean Winchester!! 🥳 Now, the actual grand finale…

Disclaimer: I first got inspired to write The Honorable Choice for @jacklesversebingo after a recent rewatch of Spirit: The Stallion of the Cimarron (with a tinge of Yellowstone in the mix). I’ve done a fair bit of research for this now ongoing series, both on the Native American Lakota tribe, and on American history during this time in the late 1800s; AKA: the Old West, during the American Indian Wars.

Jacklesverse Bingo24 Prompt: Western AU

Song Inspo: The Spirit Soundtrack

Word Count: 6K

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only. Protective Dean, survival situations, blood and violence, angst, fluff, and spice.~

🐎 Series Masterlist || Bingo Masterlist

Part 4: One People

Dean straps on his bow and arrow, but first he takes up his gun from his thigh holster. Then he saddles up Mato and climbs up on his back.

The horse is raring to go, and for once he responds to the firmness of Dean’s tone and trusts him enough to obey his commands.

Šóta, Otaktay, and the other men do the same with their horses. Soon, they’re thundering down the hill into the village.

It’s already chaos.

Dean recognizes the blue uniforms of the U.S. Cavalrymen tearing through tipis and shooting with rifles and revolvers. They must’ve tracked Šóta and his men back to the village.

Men and horses are the main targets, but women and children are getting caught in the crossfire. Šóta purposefully knocks his horse into an officer who had his weapon aimed at Misae and her two daughters. Otaktay guides them in the opposite direction, pointing the way to escape into the forest.

Dean rides onward through the village. He and Mato leap over fallen bodies and horses, and Dean shoots at an officer who would’ve shot him first. He has to be careful with his bullets though. He only has two left.

He fights his way to the center, all the while searching for any sight of Mila’s dark hair. It’s almost impossible to see with so many people running and screaming and fighting. But when he hears a familiar voice, Dean cuts to an abrupt stop.

Chief Tahatan rides his horse, white and dappled black. He wields an ax as the horse rears up on his hind legs and lets loose a powerful bray. Just ahead of him is Colonel Sanderson, flanked by Benny and another officer. The Colonel holds a rifle poised in his hands.

“Stop!” Dean shouts.

He rides hard towards the scene. He takes aim with his gun, and he shoots. The bullet clips Sanderson in the shoulder. Yelling in pain, he recoils from the force of the bullet and misses his shot.

Dean’s just not fast enough.

The Colonel’s bullet ricochets off the ground and hits Tahatan’s horse. The animal whinnies and buckles, and he brings Tahatan down along with him, rolling onto his side and crushing the Chief’s legs and most of his torso under the horse’s weight. Dean hears the crunch of bone as the Chief utters a stifled grunt.

Gritting his teeth, Dean brings Mato to a short stop in front of the Chief. Dean aims his gun at the Colonel. By now, the man is clutching his bleeding shoulder and staring at his former captain in disbelief. Benny is maybe a little less shocked to see Dean, but there’s conflict in his eyes—happiness mixed with turmoil.

The other officer is Jack Kline. He recognizes Dean too, with wide eyes and a gaping mouth.

“You…” Sanderson trails. He blinks, his brows furrowing. “Dean Winchester.”

Other officers come to join him, both on their horses and on foot. A few of them have wrangled women and their children, along with a few men. One man is dragging Mila along by the arm, even though she pulls and struggles against his hold. He has a long, jagged cut over one closed eye that streams with blood, and Dean doesn’t have to wonder how it got there. The man holds Mila’s own knife to her throat.

Dean’s heart falls into his stomach as he meets her gaze. Hers is angry, until she finds him. Her brown eyes are relieved and hopeful, but then worried for him. Dean reads it all there. He knows her face as well as he knows his own.

“Now this is what we call an interesting development,” Sanderson says, dragging Dean’s attention back to him.

Dean only feels moderately better when Šóta, Otaktay, Chatan, and a couple of the other men come to flank him on either side. Weaya manages to shuffle away from the officer at her back, just to go to Tahatan. He’s still lying there under his horse, breathing shallowly. Šóta itches to climb down from his horse and go to his father, but he can’t allow Dean to stand on his own.

“Apparently your death has been greatly exaggerated, son,” Sanderson says. He glances at Benny, who wears a grim, guilty frown.

“I’m not your fucking son,” Dean says, his voice laden with grit. His hand tightens on his raised gun.

Sanderson tsks at him while Jack wraps a rag tightly around his arm to help stem the bleeding. Afterwards, he adjusts his blue jacket and his Stetson.

“Is this really how you’ve been living for all these months? Like a dog, sleeping in the thatch with the fleas,” he remarks as he glances around. But his gaze stops on Mila. His brows crunch together as recognition dawns in his eyes.

“Ah, now I see why,” he says. He reaches for his pistol at his belt and points it at Mila, like it’s merely an extension of his hand. Dean’s jaw clenches. Chatan and Šóta become even more tense; their horses shift in place, picking up on their riders’ unrest. Sanderson notes their reactions, and finally Dean’s too.

“Instead of putting this savage bitch down, you took her for yourself, didn’t you?” Sanderson wonders aloud. His face breaks into amusement, as his deep chuckle echoes in the clearing. “You threw it all away. A promising career, your respect as a man, and even your life. A traitor to your goddamn country. And for what?”

His thumb pulls back the safety on his revolver.

“Enough, you bastard. You deal with me,” Dean tersely demands. He slowly lowers his gun, and his last bullet. “Let her go. Let them all go, and you can have me. Court martial me. Hell, put me in front of a firing squad, or put me down like a dog if that’s what you want… But let them go.” 

Mila breaths in sharply. She stares at Dean like she wants to protest.

“Ah, but ya see, I didn’t come here for you,” Sanderson says. Without taking his aim off Mila, his shifts his gaze down to Tahatan, who struggles for every breath. “I’m gonna wash this land clean, from here to the West Coast. However long it takes.”

“Colonel!” an officer calls out. He approaches on a horse, though he leads a man by a rope that ties his wrists behind his back.

Dean’s eyes widen in shock. It’s Cas, and he has Sam as his captive. Sam is dirtier and more disheveled since Dean saw him off not too long ago. He’s lost his hat and his horse, but he doesn’t look afraid when he meets Dean’s gaze, then the assessing Colonel.

“Mr. Winchester. I should’ve known,” Sanderson says dryly. “Here to reacquaint yourself with your brother? Though I’ve got a feeling you already have.”

“What’re you gonna do about it? Kill me?” Sam says. “In case you’ve forgotten, I work for the government too. I’m a prosecutor for all the surrounding counties in Kansas City.”

Sanderson raises a brow. “Is that supposed to intimidate me, son?”

“It should, Colonel,” Sam says. He nods at his brother. “The world already thinks he’s dead. Fine. But there’s plenty of people who know I traveled to Fort Laramie. People high up in the chain of command. If you hurt me, my brother, or these people, someone’s gonna hear about it. And soon.”

“He’s got a point there, Colonel,” Benny says.

“You shut the fuck up!” Sanderson barks at his captain. “You’re lucky I don’t shoot you down where you stand. You and Novak. But believe you me, I’ll be dealin’ with you later.”

Sanderson continues to seethe. He thinks hard about the decision he makes next as he stares down at Sam, and then back up at Dean. He grits his teeth, his mustache twitching. Dean holds his breath, though he briefly meets eyes with his brother.

Slowly, Sanderson lowers his weapon away from Mila. Dean can breathe again, if shallowly. He doesn’t drop his guard though. In fact, he watches Sanderson even closer.

“I’ll give you dirty mongrels one hour to clear out of here,” Sanderson says, his eyes narrowed. “Anything left gets tied down and burned to charcoal.”

With that, he sharply tugs on his horse’s reins. He commands his men to fall back, and like the soldiers they are, they obey. Benny and Cas both cast Dean a backwards glance—one that tells Dean that he still has the loyalty of his friends. He now realizes that Cas brought Sam back for a purpose; it wasn’t to hurt him, but to help him. Hell, he wouldn’t be surprised if the whole “capture” was Sam’s idea.

After the soldiers clear out of the area with the Colonel, Dean and the other men dismount from their horses. He beelines for Mila, gathering her into the safety of his arms. Then he spares a hand to grab his brother’s shoulder as he smiles.

“I think I’m more glad to see you the second time,” Dean remarks.

“I’ll take that,” Sam says. His grin is infectious, but Dean returns his attention to his wife. He touches her cheek and runs his assessing gaze over her body. He frowns as he examines the thin cut along her neck where the soldier pressed the blade of her knife.

“You okay? Are you hurt?” he asks.

Mila shakes her head. “I’m fine.” Though she inspects him the same way with a wandering hand across his chest. Dean takes that hand and gives her a reassuring smile.

It falls when he hears Weaya crying. She sits beside three other women, including Šóta’s mother.

“Father,” Šóta says lowly. His voice is a rasp as he kneels beside Tahatan’s broken body, holding his hand. The chief manages to raise his head slightly. He looks at his son, and then his gaze travels. Eventually, it falls on Dean.

Tahatan smiles.

“Under this sky,” he says. “We are one people.”

 He takes three more labored breaths before his eyes close. Šóta lays his father’s limp hand over his chest, which no longer moves.

Šóta’s mother gently raises her husband’s head to remove his long headdress. Among other things, it’s made of leather, glass beads, horsehair, and eagle tail feathers. Each feather represents a warrior’s honor earned in war, like a soldier’s insignia. 

With shaking hands, she places it on Šóta’s head. He takes a deep breath, and he looks up at the many tear-stained faces that mirror his own.

“We have to go,” he says.

Sam stays to help mobilize the tribe. He helps a mother join her children into one of the caravans, then he and Otaktay heft rolled up tipis and supplies into the back of it.

“You are a law man?” Otaktay asks him.

Sam nods. “That’s right.”

“Make better laws,” Otaktay says, and walks away.

Sam is left with a bemused look on his face. Dean comes over and thumps him on the back.

“Making friends?” he says dryly.

“Don’t think so,” Sam replies. He shakes his head and follows his brother over to the second caravan.

“Eh, consider yourself lucky. That guy pretty much hates my guts,” Dean whispers.

Sam raises his brows. “What?”

Dean explains the story in its simplest, briefest terms. Meanwhile, the mood around their packing is somber and quiet.

For Mila, it feels wrong. It’s wrong for them to have to leave the river where they’ve tilled and nurtured the land for three generations. It’s wrong to leave Chief Tahatan’s body wrapped beside Takoda’s on the hill without at least one proper night of mourning. She feels her grief down to her very core, but all she can do is sit in the caravan beside her mother and hold protective hands around the small swell of her stomach. Her tears fall silently down her cheeks and dissolve between the indigo beads on her dress.

She only raises her head when Chatan comes to check on her and her mother. He touches Mila’s cheek, drying her tears there. He leans in to kiss Weaya’s hand.

“We leave soon,” he says.

“Where is Dean?” Mila asks.

“Helping Šóta,” Chatan replies, but he stops short and corrects himself. “He helps our Chief.”

A few moments later, the caravans begin to move as the horses pull with the reins. Šóta leads at the front with a few of the warriors, but the rest of them ride strategically around and behind the caravans. Sam and Dean fall back to ride beside Mila’s caravan, where Chatan sits at the helm. Sam has been given the horse of a fallen warrior, while Dean rides Mato.

Despite how low she feels, Mila smiles at the sight of her horse allowing Dean to ride him, even with a saddle and bridle.

“Mato is being agreeable,” she remarks.

“You sound surprised,” Dean says, teasing slightly. “Told you I’d get him to trust me eventually.”

“More like wear him down,” she quips back.

“Hey, he impregnated my mare. Without my say so, I might add. I’d say we’re proper father and son-in-law.”

“Yes,” Chatan chimes in wryly. “That is what that means.”

Mila scoffs at him, but the gleam of good humor in his eyes amuses her. She smiles as she rubs a hand over her belly. Dean smiles too. It’s strange that he can still do that after a night like tonight, but seeing Chatan do it, along with Sam, and Mila, and her mother too, it gives him hope for them—for all of them.

Until the first gunshot fires into the air.

Dean freezes. His body coils tight, and he turns to look sharply over his shoulder.

He shouldn’t be surprised that Colonel Sanderson went back on his word. His cavalrymen are gaining behind them on horseback, hooting and hollering like it’s a game for sport. His jaw clenching in both anger and determination, Dean tells Chatan to speed up the caravan. He locks eyes with Mila for a moment.

Be safe, he tries to say with that look.

Then he gives Sam a nod; together they speed up to alert Šóta at the front.

“They’re gaining on us,” Dean says, gesturing behind them. “We need to lead them away from the caravans and pick ‘em off—as many as we can.”

Šóta nods in grim agreement, but he has a moment of hesitation as he considers Dean.

“You go with the caravans,” he says.

Dean shakes his head. “No, I’m ending this. Once and for all.”

“You are willing to fight your people?” Šóta asks.

The set of Dean’s determined face doesn’t change.

“I’m protecting my people,” he says. He looks to Sam. “Stay with the caravans. Make sure they get across the river.”

Sam agrees, and the men split ways. Dean turns Mato away from the group along with Šóta and Otaktay, and a few other warriors. The caravans continue with Sam to help guide them. Mila clings to the edge and watches with growing dread as her husband rides farther and farther away from her.

Dean can’t allow himself to look back. Instead of drawing his gun, he reaches for his bow strapped to his back and an arrow from his quiver. He takes aim at the first soldier he sees raise his gun, along with a steadying breath, and he shoots his arrow before the other man can fire. The arrow embeds itself in the man’s chest and knocks him clean off his horse.

Šóta and Otaktay follow suit. They shout out yips and battle cries on the air as they take aim. The soldiers begin to scatter out of their formation. They weren’t expecting the Lakota to go on the offensive. Sanderson has conveniently let his men ride ahead of him, but Dean hears him giving the orders from behind. The Colonel has his left arm wrapped in a sling while he holds his gun aloft.

“All right, mustang,” Dean says to Mato, tightening his hands on the reins. “Remind ‘em why they should be scared a’ you.”

He gives the stallion a subtle kick. It’s just enough for him to pick up into a full gallop. Dean tucks his head down and lets the horse speed forward like a bullet carving across the plain. The soldiers take aim, but that’s when Šóta and Otaktay join in from behind. They begin to take down the uniformed men, one by one as they weave between bullets. 

Dean tears between two officers and unbalances them. Mato, with his big head and chest, bulldozes straight through them. They shout in surprise and fear, and one of them even topples off his horse. Dean banks left and turns Mato around to finish what he started.

He retrieves his knife from his thigh holster and slices into one man’s neck, making him choke on his own blood. Dean forcefully takes the rifle off another man, and after flipping it around, hits him dead between the eyes with the butt of it—once, then twice until his nose breaks. He careens back off his horse into the dirt. Dean wracks the rifle and shoots the man for good measure.

The sound of a safety clicking back alerts him and turns his head, but he’s too late.

An arrow flies into the officer’s throat.

Dean looks over sharply. He finds Otaktay, lowering his bow.

Dean’s eyes widen. The other man just saved his life.

Dean nods in thanks, and Otaktay slowly returns the gesture. The moment is cut short, however, when Dean sharpens in alarm. Instead of opening his mouth to warn, he knows he has no time, not even to grab another arrow. He just throws his knife.

It carves through the air and hits Jack Kline where his arm meets his shoulder—his shooting arm that would’ve clipped Otaktay with his pistol. Jack falls off his horse and hits the ground hard, the air leaving his lungs in a hot rush. He groans in pain while clutching his arm. It’s not an easy wound, but he’ll live…as long as Otaktay doesn’t kill him first. Still on his horse, he towers over the younger man with another arrow notched.

“Wait!” Dean shouts.

He meant what he said about finishing this, but now looking at Jack, all Dean sees is a kid following orders. He doesn’t deserve to die like this, hundreds of miles away from home, just trying to make something of himself.

Otaktay looks up, wasting a precious second. Another beat, and a bullet tears into him, almost forcing him off his horse. Dean grits his teeth and speeds forward. Šóta rejoins them in time to help lead Otaktay away; he’s been hit in the side. There’s no telling how deep, but all Dean can focus on is the path ahead.

He comes face to face with Colonel Sanderson.

Dean raises his bow and arrow and ducks his head against another bullet, still shooting off his arrow. It misses its aim at the horse’s legs, but it spooks him enough to whinny in distress. It begins to buck off the Colonel.

“Whoa!” he shouts, trying to take back control of the horse. Dean rides in close and cracks a fist across Sanderson’s face. His head whips back with a pained grunt. Dean grabs his wrist and twists, until he feels tendons popping and the gun loosened from the other man’s hand. Then, Dean brings his elbow up into Sanderson’s nose and spills blood.

“Fuck!” Sanderson growls. He manages to land a punch of his own with his left arm, despite how it makes his shoulder bleed again. Dean recovers from the blow to his cheek and goes to grab that wound, digging in his fingers hard. He’s satisfied by the howl of pain Sanderson lets loose.

Dean doesn’t care if it’s a dirty tactic. He’s taking any opportunity he can, because right now, it’s not about his honor. It’s about protecting what’s his.

But Sanderson fights back just as dirty. He grabs Dean by the back of his neck and headbutts him, so hard he sees stars. Sanderson lands one more kick to Dean’s chest that almost sends him off of Mato. Dean has to grab on tight to the saddle and pull himself up, just in time for a lassoed rope to circle around his neck. Dean’s eyes fly wide in alarm. He slips his hand between the rope and his neck just in time before it tightens—because Sanderson tugs hard as he urges his horse into a gallop.

“Aw, sh—” Dean is yanked off Mato. He lands hard in the dirt, before he begins to be dragged across it.

Once again, the current is strong across Little Cheyenne. The first caravan has more horses to pull it through, but the caravan that Chatan is trying to lead starts to take on water. Mila and her mother sit behind him, along with Misae and her daughters, Tahatan’s widows, and Eyota and her husband.

The colt is doing his best to keep going, but Baby and two of the other horses are struggling in the pull of the river. They’ve hit a deeper patch under the water, and now it’s all the way up to Baby’s chest. She can’t handle the weight of the caravan along with the river’s current.

Sam comes closer with rope in hand, but Mila can see in his eyes that he’s trying to decide what to do. She grasps the edge of the caravan to pull herself up, and she points to the black mare.

“She needs help!” she calls out to him.

“Mila, sit down!” Chatan orders.

Mila turns back to her father with a determined set to her face. She knows his ankle has never healed entirely right. If he tries to do what she’s about to do, he’d probably fall into the river and get trampled by the horses. She knows what she must do.

She carefully stands up all the way and moves to the edge of the caravan, ignoring her father and mother trying to stop her. Sam’s eyes grow wide, but he tries to come in closer to support her. She steps out onto Baby’s back and slides into an astride position. The frigid water climbs up Mila’s dress and reaches her waist, making her shiver, but she ignores that too. She reaches out for Sam.

“Throw me the rope!” she calls out.

Sam follows her lead and does what she says. Mila not only catches the rope, but loops the ends of it around Baby’s bridle and around her chest. It’s hard work, especially because Mila has to tread water just to get the rope around the mare’s wide chest, but Sam helps her as much as he can.

When they’ve finished securing the ropes, Sam pulls ahead. With his horse leading Baby, she gets the momentum she needs to climb out of the dip, and eventually, cross the rest of the river.

Mila is sopping wet by the time they make it to the other side. Her braid has come loose, and so her hair becomes a black curtain around her face. She clings to Baby as she catches her breath, stroking the horse’s neck.

“Good girl. Big, strong girl,” she soothes. “Your father will be proud of you.”

Speaking of, Mila turns to look back. Across the river, the men are still fighting off the soldiers that sought to finish what they started last night. Mila scans with narrowed eyes for Dean.

“You all right?” Sam asks. He sidles up next to her and grasps her shoulder to make sure.

“Fine,” she breathes.

But she hesitates on a sharp inhale. Her brows furrow as she tries to make sure of what she’s seeing. Her mouth drops open in shock.

“Sam!” She points out the shape of a man she thinks is Dean. Sam follows her line of vision and becomes just as alarmed at what he sees.

Mila immediately takes her father’s knife from her shoe and cuts the ropes that bind Baby to the caravan. Mila puts her fingers to her lips and whistles sharply instead of kicking the mare. Baby sharpens to attention and heeds the command, just like she’s done for Dean a hundred times before.

Mila guides her back through the river.

Dean is being road hauled across the plain. He hits every bump, rock, twig, and dry patch of dirt in several yards as he twists and struggles to break free.

He lost his knife to save Otaktay, and he’s probably lost all his arrows along with his bow. Dean grits his teeth, as he can hear Sanderson’s insane hooting and hollering on the wind whipping past his ears, and not much else.

He doesn’t know where Šóta is, or if even Otaktay’s still alive, but his last thoughts aren’t about them. Instinctively, he thinks of his wife. It’s not even a coherent thought. It’s just her name, her face, her hand on his heart.

And the rope snaps.

Dean grunts as his momentum slows. He rolls across the dirt and grass to a stop. He probably has road burns and cuts and bruises all down his back, but at least he can stare up at the morning sun and breathe.

Heaving for free air, he tugs the rope from around his neck and shoves it off. He hears familiar horse hooves galloping his way. Somehow, he manages to raise his head.

Now, either the sun is playing tricks on him, or a black shape is thundering towards him.

Apparently, his eyes aren’t lying to him. Baby slows to a stop, and Mila climbs down from her back. Mila rushes to his side and kneels beside him after putting away her knife. She takes his face into her gentle hands.

“Dean?” she says, her voice tinged with desperation.

He grabs onto her wrist and smiles weakly, looking up at her soulful brown eyes.

“You’re not supposed to be here,” he says.

She sighs and shakes her head, despite the tears in her eyes.

“Be quiet,” she laughs. Dean just grins.

She cups the back of his neck and guides him up slowly into a sitting position. His back is a bloody mess, but they’ll deal with that later.

“You all right, brother?”

Dean’s smile drops. He clutches at Mila’s arm protectively, but he looks up at Benny Lafitte. His horse shifts in place. Dean finally notices Sam is there too, with his gun trained on Benny. But Benny’s gun is raised right back at Sam.

They’re joined by Colonel Sanderson. He wears a self-satisfied look on his face as he approaches with his pistol held aloft.

“Well, well,” he drawls. “Ain’t this a picture. Traitors and savages.”

Mila keeps her back to the Colonel; she stubbornly defends Dean with her body, even though he’s gathered her to his chest protectively. With his right hand, he subtly reaches for the gun holster at his thigh. One last weapon. One last shot.

He shares a look with Mila, silently asking her to trust him. She gives him a subtle nod.

“Captain Lafitte,” Sanderson addresses Benny, even though his gaze is straight on Dean and Mila. He holds Sam in his periphery. “Now’s the time to take a stand. Are you gonna serve your country and put these three in the ground where they belong, or are you gonna join ‘em?”

Benny stares back at his superior officer. He thought he understood before, but today is when he truly understands why Dean made his choice.

Benny lowers his weapon down to his side.

“This ain’t the law,” he says. “This ain’t justice. It’s just pride, plain and simple. Your pride, Colonel.”

After a moment of genuine surprise, Sanderson rolls his eyes. He shifts his gun off of Sam and points it at Benny next.

A trigger fires, but the bullet that hits its mark is not the Colonel’s.

It’s Dean’s, and it hits Asmodeus Sanderson between the eyes.

Dean lowers his silver, smoking Colt down at his side, where Mila moved just in time for Dean to take his shot. He holds her to him now, taking in deep breaths.

Benny and Sam both look to Dean with shock still in their eyes, but before either of them can say anything, they notice Cas stumbling over on foot with a wounded Jack Kline leaning heavily on him. They’re flanked on both sides by Šóta and Otaktay. The latter has a cloth tied tight around his middle. His bullet wound just looks like a nasty graze.

The other warriors that remain follow behind, and they have Mato and Baby in tow by their bridles.

Dean realizes that Cas and Jack are the only other survivors from the rest of the unit. Šóta has taken them prisoner. He orders the other men to force Benny off of his horse. They shove him closer to Cas and Jack.

Dean quickly tries to raise up onto his knees, though it’s hard for him to stand. Mila helps him the rest of the way, and he keeps his arm wrapped around her shoulders.

“We will make an example of these,” Šóta says, nodding at Cas, Jack, and Benny. They look rightly nervous, shifting their gazes towards Dean.

Dean raises his hands to placate Šóta (and hopefully reassure his friends).

“Šóta, I know these guys. They were my men,” he says. “They were just following the Colonel’s orders.”

“And what does that mean to me, Dean Winchester?” Šóta says. He climbs down from his horse, his headdress of feathers tousled as a breeze rushes through.

“It means they won’t follow us,” Dean says. “They won’t tell the Army what actually happened here. They’ll keep their word if I ask them to. So I’m asking you…trust me. Trust me like you’ve trusted me before.”

Šóta seems to consider it, even though he doesn’t exactly like the idea. Otaktay seems to like it even less.

“We won’t betray you, Chief,” Benny says to Šóta, and to the other warriors. “We respect you, and we don’t want any more trouble. For us, or for Dean.”

Šóta considers this with a tilt of his head. Before he decides, first, he turns to Otaktay. Other than Dean, he’s now the man Šóta trusts most.

Otaktay looks over at Dean. Between them, there’s an understanding. Finally, there’s also respect. Otaktay returns his gaze to his leader, and he nods.

Šóta expels a deep breath. He addresses the three soldiers.

“Go. Go in peace, or next time, there will not be peace,” he says.

The soldiers breathe in relief.

Dean steps forward with Mila’s help. There he shakes each man’s hand. He’s said goodbye to Cas and Benny before, but somehow, this feels even more final than the last.

Benny and Cas are given back their horses. They help Jack up first, then Cas climbs up with him. Benny mounts his own horse, and Sam, Dean, and the Lakota watch them leave the way they came.

It takes days to cross the plains and maneuver through the mountains, but Šóta leads the rest of the tribe to safety within Sioux territory. They find a place to settle along the Big Cheyenne River, northeast of the Black Hills.

There they will learn the land and what to plant and forage there for the late autumn harvest, as summer ends. There is where they will honor the dead who couldn’t make the journey. There is where their traditions will be celebrated, old and new.

Like today. The men have painted each other with blue circles around their faces and blue lines across their foreheads, chins, and cheekbones. The women are painted similarly in red. It symbolizes change in its many forms, but most of all, it symbolizes new relationships, and new responsibilities.

Today, it’s Huŋkápi. The Making of Relatives. This ceremony formally welcomes Dean into the tribe by marriage. It also recognizes Sam as his brother, and so, it acknowledges Sam as a friend to their tribe as well. They are now all family. One people.

Dean sits with his brother around the large firepit, where a roasted boar is already half-eaten. Dean has shared a lot of meals with these people, but somehow, this one is the best he’s ever eaten. Maybe it’s the company, he thinks, as he laughs at some old story Sam is trying to tell.

“No, no, no, that’s not what happened. Let me tell it—”

“What, so you can make stuff up?”

“Oh, I’m making stuff up?”

Mila giggles quietly, but it’s enough to earn Dean’s attention. She sits at his left, and he turns to her with an amused smile.

“What’re you laughing at?” he teases. His arm wraps around her waist and pulls her in.

“You,” she replies. “You and your brother. You’re worse than me and Šóta.”

Dean chuckles and shakes his head. He points over at her cousin, their esteemed Chief, who’s busy making shadow creatures with exaggerated voices to impress the kids. Right now, it’s a big grizzly bear that threatens to eat the closest child.

“Worse than the grizzly?” Dean says.

“Hmm, maybe not,” she says with a laugh.

That evening, Dean is glad he convinced Sam to start sleeping in his own tipi. He agreed to stay until Mila has the baby, but while Dean is grateful to have his brother here for a few more months, he still wants some much-needed privacy with his wife.

He “helps” her undress for bed, all the while distracting her with lingering kisses across her neck and shoulders, winding his fingers into her long hair. He wraps his arms around her and cups her full breasts from behind, satisfied by the arousing way she moans.

“They’re heavier,” Dean whispers in her ear, gently squeezing her breasts. She hums in response. “Your thighs and hips are thicker too, nice and soft for me.” He squeezes those too for good measure.

“I am changing,” she admits. “Are they good changes?”

“Hell yeah,” Dean says, his lips moving against her throat. He gently turns her around and guides her down to lay on the bedding and furs. He palms at the best change of all—the growing swell of her belly. She’s gotten bigger, and growing a little more each week. Dean really wants to meet his kid.

He dips down to lay a path of slow, tender kisses down between her breasts, and over her belly. Mila smiles and threads her fingers through his hair. It’s getting long, brushing past his ears.

“Do you want a son, or a daughter?” she asks him. It’s not the first time she’s asked, but she wonders if his answer will change now, after everything they’ve gone through to get here. She finds that her own answer hasn’t changed.

Dean shakes his head. “I don’t care. Either one.”

All he wants is for the baby to be healthy, and for Mila to be healthy too. He moves back up to claim her lips. When he kisses her like this, he hopes she knows what he’s really saying. Just in case, he says it anyway. He says it out loud to her for the first time.

“I love you,” he says. He pauses, then smiles a little. “You know, you’re the only woman I’ve ever said that to.”

She smiles, because she knows. With her hand over his heart, she knows.

And when their son is born a few months later, she has a dream. She dreams of an eagle’s wings that shift from white to gold in the light.

Dean plans to give him a name he picked out weeks before, Elijah. It was his father’s middle name. But she will also give their son a name.

Ikíphi, the name her uncle, Chief Tahatan, gave Dean Winchester himself.

Because one day, she knows her son will be worthy of it.

AN: And there we have it! A more definitive end to Dean and Mila's story. 🥹

For those of you who read and enjoyed this, thank you so much for sticking with me through this sequel of The Honorable Choice. This was an idea that wouldn't let go of me once I started, and it's the first time that I've written something like this. 💖💖

Pronunciation Guide:

Wašíču ("wash-ee-jew") Šóta ("sho-tah") Chatan ("chat-tan") Tahatan ("ta-hat-tann") Otaktay ("ogh-tac-tay") Weaya ("we-ayy-ya") Takoda ("ta-koda") Mato ("matt-toe") Misae ("mee-sah-eh")

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[jeyramarie]

You and me?- Alice Chambers x Reader (Part 4)

summary: dinner with the Chamber’s in quite... interesting. 

wc: 2,559

warnings: cursing, mentions of abuse, mentions of sex, angst

a/n: i am so excited for this part y’all, just wait for what’s to come🥲 i hope you all enjoy! lmk if you wanna be tagged, feedback is appreciated and happy reading 🦋

Part 1~ Part 2~ Part 3~

“Um.. there’s just something going on-“ I began and got interrupted by the door bursting open. 

“Alice?!” Bunny shouted, walking into the room to look at us in question. 

I didn’t blame her. We did look suspicious. I was only wrapped in my towel, my hair dripping wet and Alice was very close to me, holding my hands. It seemed like she had interrupted something… personal. 

“Was I interrupting something important?” 

“No, no, it’s alright.” I replied quickly, staring at the ground. “I was just telling Alice that William wants her and Jack to come over tonight.” The blonde looked at me, silently asking if it was true and I nodded. “He wants to catch up with his old friend.” 

“Exactly.” Alice chuckled nervously. “What dessert should I bring? Maybe some pie or a peach cobbler?” 

“They both sound delightful.” I smiled, tightening my grip on her hand. “Bring whichever you’d like, I’ll see you both tonight?” 

“Of course, we will be there.” Alice nodded and gave me a soft smile before releasing my hand. 

“Alright, well I’ll see you tonight and Bunny, I'll see you around.” I said and walked back into the shower, turning on the faucet to hear the sound of heels walking out. 

I let out a breath and stuck my head under the warm water once more before finishing up quickly. Luckily, the trolley was there when I walked out and none of the girls were on it. Which gave me a moment of silence, to think. To think about how I was going to tell Alice. To think about every possible way she would react. To think about whether she experienced it as well or if she didn’t, I was going to look like a psychopath. 

When I arrived home, no one was outside. Usually Bunny would be playing with her kids and Violet would be watering her plants. That wasn’t the case today. Perhaps I had made them so uncomfortable with my comment, that they didn’t even want to recognize that I was home. I walked inside and quickly changed into a bright pink dress with my black heels to get started on dinner. 

After a few hours, the table was finally set with four places. William arrived and I greeted him at the door with a glass of scotch. He kissed me for a bit but it was all cut short when the doorbell rang, meaning that Jack and Alice were finally here. 

“Make a drink for Jack.” I said and tapped William’s chest before running to the door. 

Immediately, I stopped and smoothed out my skirt, then tucked a few stray hairs before finally turning the doorknob. There they were. Jack smiled and walked inside, going straight to William as Alice stood there staring at me. Her smile faltered, it seemed like she was looking past me. I turned around and saw that the boys weren’t there so I turned back to stare at her. 

“Alice?” I asked in worry, walking closer to her with my hand on the door. “Alice?!” I asked again, raising my voice a bit making her blink rapidly as she looked around in confusion. “Are you alright?” 

“Oh, yes, yes.” She nodded as she chuckled nervously. “My apologies. We should go inside.” She said and walked past me as I stood there in worry. 

I closed the door and walked into the kitchen to see Alice placing the pie on the counter. The boys talked about Bill and Dean as they laughed loudly. I fidgeted with my fingers and turned to them, giving them a fake smile. 

“Shall we start?” I asked and turned to Alice to see her nod. 

“We should, I’m starving.” William chuckled, padding his stomach before walking towards the table. 

Jack followed him and stopped to extend his hand for Alice to grab. He lifted her hand and kissed the top before walking over to the table to pull out her chair. William sat down at the head of the table, completely focusing on the food and the drink in his hand.  

I pulled out my chair and sat down before pushing it forward to be closer to the table. We all waited until Jack sat down to begin. I grabbed the wine bottle and poured some in my glass, feeling the need for alcohol to flow in my system. 

“Would you like some wine, Alice?” I asked the blonde and she nodded, making me pour some into her glass as well. 

We passed the bowls around the table, creating small talk and making jokes as we ate. Sometime during the night, the boys ignored Alice and I completely. They spoke about Jack’s possible promotion and the ring he would receive while Alice and I just drank the last bit of the wine. 

“Are you boys ready for dessert?” I asked with a wide smile, placing down my glass before turning to Alice. 

“What’s for dessert, honey?” William smirked. 

“Alice brought over some pie.” 

“Best pie you’ll ever eat, trust me.” Jack chuckled, leaning back on his chair as he looked at William. 

“I’ll bring it out, then.” I chuckled, pushing my chair back to stand up. “Would you mind helping with the plates, Alice?” 

“Oh, of course not.” She replied, placing her glass down before standing up. “We’ll be back boys.” 

She walked into the kitchen, causing me to look up to meet her eyes. I moved from the sink, across the kitchen to take out four small plates from the cabinet. 

“Are you feeling alright?” I asked, closing the cabinet. 

“Yes, why wouldn’t I be?” Alice shrugged. 

“You seemed distracted earlier.” I said, walking towards her with the plates. “At the door when you arrived.” 

“Oh, that was nothing.” She shook her head, staring at her hands. “I was just a bit lightheaded.” 

“Lightheaded… right.” I mumbled walking towards the sink to grab a knife from the drawer before turning to her again. “Are you seeing things… by any chance?” 

“What?” Alice asked, finally staring at me. 

“Like visions, Alice.” I said sternly, leaning against the counter. “Do you see Jack differently sometimes? Like you’re somewhere else?” 

“You’ve been seeing things too?” She whispered, walking closer to me in a hurry as I nodded. “What things?” 

“I don’t know but…” I shook my head, taking a deep breath. “I see you differently and William too, like we’re somewhere else, I don’t know.” 

“Like they’re memories..” Alice muttered with a frown. 

“Exactly.” I nodded, staring at her eyes in disbelief. “Have you had nightmares?” 

“Yes.. many.” She nodded and sighed. “I told Jack about it.” 

“What did he say?” 

“He completely ignored me.” The blonde shook her head. “Just dodged the question.” 

“I haven’t told William.” I shrugged. “I don’t trust him that much.” 

“You shouldn’t but I’m glad you told me.” Alice muttered, grabbing my hands. “I was dying to tell someone.” 

“Me too. I was going to tell you today but Bunny came in and I don’t know-“ 

“Is everything alright in there?!” William shouted from the dining room. 

“Yes!” I shouted back, quickly gathering the spoons. “Just couldn’t find the dessert plates!” 

I handed Alice the plates and the cutlery before grabbing the pie to walk out of the kitchen. The boys leaned forward as I placed the pie between them, waiting for Alice to come over with the plates. She placed the plates in front of the boys and I cut out two pieces before moving to the side of the table to cut some for Alice and I. 

The boys continued to speak about whatever it was they were talking about while Alice played with her dessert. I took a few bites immediately agreeing that it was the best pie I’ve ever had. 

“Honey?” William said, interrupting my thoughts. 

“Yes?” 

“I’m going to take Jack to the living room.” He replied, standing up from his chair. “Show him that new whiskey we bought.” 

“Of course.” I nodded with a smile. “Go have fun. Alice and I will handle the dishes.” 

They stood up, leaving the blonde and I alone, finally. I stood up and walked around the table, silently grabbing every plate and cutlery before moving to the kitchen. Alice walked in behind me in silence and leaned against the counter as she finished her glass of wine. I didn’t know it yet but Alice was beginning to remember me. She stared at me as I placed the dishes in the sink, watching as my hands moved around the fine china. 

“What else do you remember?” I asked, never parting my eyes from my soapy hands. 

“It’s just bits and pieces.” She replied, walking to stand next to me. “I’m not quite sure.” 

“I had a nightmare the other night.” I started closing the faucet. “I’m not sure if it was a memory or just a dream… but it felt real… very real.” 

“What should we do?” 

“We should leave our houses.” I turned to her. “Maybe being inside for so long has caused us to think this way.” 

“No, Y/n, no.” Alice shook her head, putting down her wine glass. “Don’t do this. You can’t just ignore it.” 

“I’m not, Alice, I’m just-“ I raised my voice and stopped to take a deep breath. “I’m trying to push it aside.” 

“Why?” 

“I don’t like what I see, Alice.” I whispered. “I don’t like how my life looks and I don’t want to ruin this for William, his job is on the line.” 

“The promotion?” She asked in disbelief. “That’s what you’re worried about?” 

I sighed and placed the palm of my hands over my forehead, slowly sliding down against the counter. My knees were up to my chest and I stayed there, taking deep breaths as Alice got to her knees next to me. She grabbed my hand, making me look at her and my mind went into the familiar fuzz.  

Alice was in front of me with her hair up and what seemed like a blue shirt under her jacket. The place looked different. It was a bit dark and there was a counter beside us with bottles cluttering it. We both leaned in, as if we were going to kiss and right when I felt the slight touch of her lips, I came back. 

She was still beside me, rubbing her thumb over my hand. My eyes drifted to my lap, then to the ceiling as I took a deep breath. 

“You wanna take a ride on the trolley tomorrow?” I whispered, turning my head to her to see her nod with a small smile. 

“Sure.” Alice whispered and cupped my cheek, making the fuzz slightly come back. “It will be good for us to go on a relaxing joyride.” 

“Yeah, it will.” I replied, resting my head against the cabinet. 

The next morning, William and I discussed the rumors surrounding Margaret and Ted. He said that she was going crazy, that she sounded insane. But that’s exactly how I thought. That’s exactly how I felt, insane. After listening to his responses, I was certain I was not going to tell him. At least not now. 

Alice knocked on my door around lunch time. She was wearing a black dress with black flats and her sunglasses. Her smile was small but welcoming. It made my chest tight, I’m not really sure why. I wore a navy blue dress with black flats. My hair was pinned back, keeping in mind that it would be incredibly hot outside. 

“Are you ready?” The blonde asked, walking beside me as we made our way to the trolley stop. 

“I suppose I am.” I shrugged. “I just want a relaxing day for once.” 

We arrived at the stop just in time. The trolley was pulling up and I climbed on, luckily finding a seat in the middle. Alice automatically sat next to me and the trolley began to move. We stayed quiet the whole time and just stared. Stared at the women getting on and off. 

“No shopping day, today?” the driver asked us, causing me to look up at him through the rearview mirror. I was about to answer when Alice spoke. 

“Excuse me?” She asked. 

“I said ‘No shopping day, today?’” He repeated. 

“Oh, no.” Alice replied with a small chuckle. “We’re just enjoying the ride today.” 

“This was the last stop so I’ll circle back to town.” 

“Oh, that’s alright.” I smiled at him and turned to the window to see a red plane. 

After removing my sunglasses, I squinted my eyes, noticing that it was beginning to fly over us. I moved from my seat, to the one on the other side, trying to get a closer look. 

“Oh my god.” I muttered in surprise, making Alice look as well. 

“What the hell?’ She exclaimed, taking off her sunglasses as well. 

The plane began to fall and I stood up, running to the other side of the trolley as Alice spoke to the driver. I couldn’t take my eyes off the plane and the voices behind me became muffled as a high pitching sound filled my ears. 

“No.. oh my god! Oh my god!” I shouted, getting out of my chair. “Stop! Stop! Stop!” 

The trolley came to a stop and ran towards the front with Alice trailing behind me. He looked at me weird as if he didn’t know what I was talking about. 

“That plane just crashed!” I said hysterically. 

“Are you sure?” He asked, squinting his eyes. 

“Of course, I’m sure.” I replied, staring in disbelief. “I just saw it!”

“You need to drive up there, it just crashed, we can show you where it is!” Alice added. 

“No, um.. I don’t go that way.” He said with a straight face. 

“What?” I asked in disbelief. 

“I don’t go that way.” He shook his head. “We have to stay here, where it’s safe.” 

“I- oh my god.” Alice spoke and stared at the ground with a scoff. “We can’t go out there alone.” 

“That’s not my route, I can’t.” The driver spat and turned in his seat. 

“What if they need help?” I questioned, placing my hands on my hips. 

He stayed with his back towards us, not uttering a word. Alice tried to get his attention, but nothing worked. I scoffed and walked towards our seats, grabbing our purses before walking to the blonde. 

“You’re unbelievable.” I muttered and handed Alice her purse before stepping out of the trolley, beginning to walk towards headquarters. 

None of the wives have ever gone up there. None of us have ever gone past the entrance of Victory. It was “off limits” and only the men could cross. They crossed to get to work. They crossed to go to headquarters with Frank, their boss and the creator of the Victory project. 

Alice caught up to me as we kept on walking under the sizzling summer sun surrounded by nothing but dirt. We were in the middle of nowhere. No person or car ever came into sight. I think we were walking for about 2 hours before we even reached the road that led to headquarters. Alice and I remained quiet, drowning in our thoughts until we realized that we were almost at the top and headquarters was right in front of us. 

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[luxshine]

“Yo  a ti, Cas” Or how mexican dubbing gripped us tight and raised us from Despair.

Ok. So I promised a big meta about the dubbing thing and so while I don’t have all the answers YET, here’s a bit of perspective on the differences between Despair and The Truth.

  First, a little background. I am a former professional dubbing translator. While I worked on anime series from Japanese to Spanish, rather than in live action ones from English to Spanish, the process is not that different. Also, I worked in Mexico, where Supernatural is dubbed, so that’s why I can make the assumptions I make. Finally, my specialization in college was translation from English to Spanish, so I guess I know what the hell I’m talking about.

  So let’s start on HOW you translate something for a dub. Back in the day, you got a ton of VHS tapes with the episodes on them with time codes, and, if you were lucky, a shooting script. This is to say, it was not a transcript of the actual words said in the episode, but the script BEFORE the actors, directors, and everyone else had a hand on what was said and changed. And thus, anything adlibbed? Is not going to be in that script which, at least for the anime side of things? Was a nightmare as the script was usually “And here X actor can say whatever they want” and I had to go and listen to the scene ten thousand times. Now a days, you get either a video file or a streaming link, and sometimes, the shooting script. If you get a script, btw, you can also not get a script in the original language. I know that the person who had to translate Sprited Away to Spanish was working off a German script, not the Japanese one. So yeah, some things can be lost in translation there.

  THEN you get to translate. BUT you can’t just translate word by word. You have to adapt it so that it will sound like something a person will say, and sometimes, literally is not the way to do it. And in particular, Mexican dubbing has a reputation to uphold as the “Neutral” dub that is send to most Spanish-speaking countries in Latin America, so we can’t use certain words (I don’t have the list at hand, but I remember that I couldn’t use “Llanta” for Tire, and so I had to use “Neumatico”. And no “sweaters” or “hotcakes” or stuff like that), AND we have to match the lips of the original video. Which is like, the worst nightmare ever because of what we call “labiales”, that is to say, the letters where lips close.

  I can’t tell you how much we all loved when a character gave a long winded speech with their back to the camera due to those damned closed lip letters.

  All this is to say that sometimes, the line could be “We are all in this together for good or bad”, and the translation become something more like “Estamos en esto, por las buenas o las malas” (We’re on this, the good way or the bad way) or “Estamos juntos en las buenas y en las malas” (We’re together in the good and the bad), depending on the translator, dub director, and voice actor.

  Depending on the client, that is, the original owner of the series, sometimes they will review the translation once it’s all dubbed and edited. I know that in the Avengers movie, a Disney rep was present on the cabin and forbade any changes from the script, which resulted on a couple of awkward lines in the end result. I don’t know if that’s the case for Supernatural, but I honestly doubt it. Still, translators can’t make huge changes for the dialogue. One couldn’t just ADD a relationship that wasn’t there, no matter what.

  (As an aside, due to the very conservative mindset of some tv stations, it’s more common that gay relationships become more ambiguous, by changing “I love you” to “Te quiero” which can be more of a filial love than a romantic one. And well, that one case in Sailor Moon where a gay character was changed into a woman because the dub director honestly thought the character was a woman. But that was in the nineties)

  Now, let’s go to how Castiel’s speech was translated.

  The original, according to Superwiki, went like this:

  Castiel:  You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you out of Hell, knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam. I cared about Jack. I cared about the whole world because of you. You changed me, Dean.

Dean: Why does this sound like a goodbye? Castiel: Because it is. I love you. Dean: Don't do this, Cas. Cas.

  And the translation, as it was aired, went like this (And people, you have no idea the war flashbacks transcribing this gave me, so I hope you appreciate it):

  Castiel: Eres el hombre mas amoroso sobre la Tierra. Un hombre sin egoismo; el hombre mas generoso que haya visto, y que jamas vere. Sabes que desde que nos conocimos y desde que te saque del infierno, el conocerte me ha cambiado. Porque a ti te importa. Y a mi me importa. Me importas tu. Y me importa Sam, me importa Jack, me importa todo el mundo. Y fue por ti. Tu me cambiaste, Dean.

  Dean: Porque suena esto a despedida?

  Castiel: Porque asi fue. Te amo.

  Dean: Yo a ti, Cas. (The empty appears and Billie opens the door) Cas…

  Castiel: Adios Dean

  Dean: No!

  Ok. So… At first glance, they’re pretty much the same until we get to the I love you. BUT let’s dissect it a little bit.

  Cas begins with a “Eres el hombre mas amoroso sobre la Tierra” which is not how I would’ve translated “The most caring man on Earth” since “caring” is more like “Cariñoso” rather than “amoroso” which would be “loving”, and yes, there’s a difference. Plus, “el hombre mas amoroso” sounds a bit clunky, so Personally, I’d have gone with “Eres el hombre mas cariñoso en la Tierra”, that would’ve given us more time for the rest of the speech, but I wonder if the translator choice for Amoroso instead was more due to the fact that “amor” (love) is more clearly romantic than “care” (cariño, in a sense, more on this later) and so it foreshadows the end.

  Again, with the literal clunkyness we have “Un hombre sin egoismo” (A man without egoism) which sounds weird no matter what language you speak, and it should’ve been “Un hombre dadivoso” (A giving man) or “un hombre desinteresado” (a selfless man) although the second could be mis-construed as “a man without interests” so “dadivoso” would’ve better. But the more puzzling is that the Spanish separates the selfless man from the next, which is REALLY confusing as the English is “the most loving man”, which would be “el hombre mas amoroso” making it quite redundant, so the Spanish changes it to “the most generous man”, “el hombre mas generoso”. To add to this, Cas continues with “that I have seen and I will ever see” instead of “That I know”, because it’s far more poetic. And loving.

  So yeah, Mexican Cas is basically saying that Dean Winchester is made of love and puppies.

  Ahem.

  The next part “You know, ever since I pulled you out of hell, you’ve changed me” is more or less word for word, and the only thing that changes is that the English sounds more like a question and the Spanish one is an affirmation. YOU KNOW that ever since I pulled you out of hell, you changed me.” Little verb tense play, that doesn't change much except Cas’s resolution to say what he has to say.

  And then we get to the part that made me squeal out loud. Because we go from

  “Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam. I cared about Jack. I cared about the whole world because of you”

  To

  “Porque a ti te importa. Y a mi me importa. Me importas tu. Y me importa Sam, me importa Jack, me importa todo el mundo.” Which at first glance is the same, but NOPE.

  First change: The original is in past tense “I cared”. Spanish version is in present tense: “I care”.

Which is a little non important thing except when you remember that simple present means “immutable absolute truth that won’t change with time”

  Second, the choice of word for care.

  I mentioned before that Care can be Cariño, as in filial, non romantic love (Or romantic love pet name, as it can also be Darling. It’s one of THOSE words). Other translations for care include “cuidado” (as in attention, concern, keeping, and worry), and of course “interesarse” (Which also can be care), “preocuparse” (care, bother, trouble, mind, fuss), and yes, “importar” but “importar” ONLY translates to English as a verb as “import”, “matter” “amount to” and notice how none of those words include “love”.

  Mexican Cas is not saying “you love the world, and so I do”. Mexican Cas is saying “The world matters to you, and thus it matters to me, but my feelings for the World (and Sam, and Jack) are not in the same league as my feelings for you.”

  And then Dean asks “Why does this sound like a Goodbye”, just like in English, in present tense…

  And Mexican Cas replies in PAST tense. “Porque asi fue”. And THIS is important because it means that everything he said before WAS the goodbye, and not what comes next. All the rest? Is in the past. “Because it was”. Not “Because it IS”. And the next part? Is their future.

  I love you.

  Te amo.

  Simple present. No ambiguity like “te quiero”. Spanish Te amo is for romantic love. Not brotherly, not family, not bro-mantic. ROMANTIC.

  It’s like “I’m IN love with you” (Although that’d be “Estoy enamorado de ti” and I doubt that would’ve fit in the time Misha spoke)

  And of course, the answer. “Yo a ti, Cas”. Not “And I, you” as I’ve seen it before (And I also thought it was, until transcribing the scene) but a simple “I, you, Cas.” Which ok, pretty cave-speak, but the meaning is pretty clear. Dean Winchester loves his gay angel.

  It is also telling that the empty doesn’t appear until AFTER Dean confessed, so no, Mexican Cas is not “happy with the saying”, he had to get to the “happy with the having”.

  And when Billy appears, it does seem as if he wants to say something more, but Cas is a love-sick selfsacrificing dumbass and so we all get our hearts broken.

I did get in contact with Dean Winchester’s mexican voice actor, and am waiting for answers to a small interview I did with him which includes the question “did that And I you, Cas” was in the script, and am trying to contact Castiel’s mexican voice actor. So I will be updating you on that. But I hope this clears up some of the questions about how Mexican dubbing made Destiel Canon :D

[pearlycastiel]

𝐦𝐲 𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥.

description || you’re in trouble and when you pray to your boyfriend jack, he doesn’t hesitate to help you.

pairing || jack kline x fem!reader, dean winchester x daughter!reader, sam winchester x niece!reader, castiel x platonic!reader

warnings || angst, partying, alcohol, fluff at ending

word count || 1,458

a/n || literally had this idea at 3 am haha. feedback and reblogs are very much appreciated <3

HIGH SCHOOL WAS something for you and it was definitely something when your family are supernatural hunters. Being Dean Winchester's daughter meant having the best protection from an angel, a nephilim, and of course, your father and uncle.

When you first met Jack, you felt a feeling that you have never felt with anyone else. At first, you thought it was anxiety or fear from the fact that Jack was Lucifer's son, but soon enough, it was something good.

The hints that you've noticed from Jack such as him being close to you at all times, or him smiling brightly when you would walk into his room, hinted clearly how Jack had some sort of attraction to you as well.

Soon enough, when Jack finally got the gist of how human feelings worked, he confessed how he couldn't stand a life without you. He would gush about how important you were to him and how he wanted to protect you at all costs. That was the day he asked you to be his girlfriend.

And you proudly said yes.

This brings you to this day, where school was more bearable with your slightly reconstructed life. When you started to date Jack, life became somewhat more admissable as you had something to look forward to when you came home.

You were currently coming out of soccer practice and one of your decent acquaintances walked up to you.

"Hey, Y/n. Are you free tonight? I'm having this big party and you should definitely come." Lexi was a really sweet person and you knew her parties were fun. You thought about it for a while considering how overprotective your family is. But you said yes anyway, wanting to have a fun time.

"Sure, I'll see you tonight."

ஓ๑♥๑ஓ

Back at the bunker, you gave your family a dramatic entrance as you started to sing aloud abruptly, definitely gaining the attention of the boys.

Jack was the first one to greet you and he gave you one of his heartwarming hugs and a small kiss on your cheek.

"Hi Y/n, how was school today? I also made your favorite because I know you had a long day at today." You stared at Jack in awe, finding it sweet how he would make you a grilled cheese when you came home from school.

"Thanks, Jack. What would I do without you?"

"I should be the one asking you that. You mean a lot to me, Y/n." A smile crept upon your lips and you were about to kiss Jack until you heard the booming voice of your father.

"Hey! Six feet apart kids," Dean said, getting in between you and Jack, him spreading his arms out, pretending to stretch.

"So funny, dad," you said sarcastically. You weren't too certain when you should ask your father if you could go to the party, but you didn't have to ask when he saw the look on your face.

"I know that look, what's up?" Surprised by his diligent attention, you shot your head up slightly caught off guard.

"Oh, well...what makes you think there's something up?"

"Whenever you're nervous, you always fidget with your charm bracelet." You silently cursed to yourself, seeing how you gave away the hint of wanting something. Sighing in defeat, you decided to tell Dean about the party.

"So I got invited to this party and I was won--"

Before you could even finish your sentence, Dean cut you off abruptly, knowing where this was going to go.

"No. Nope. Nope, definitely not. You're not going to a party and that's final." Dean's voice made it clear he was serious, but you being the stubborn person you were, insisted.

"Dad, come on, it's going to be fun, plus you know I'm responsible enough." Dean consistently shook his head, not comfortable with you going to a party.

"I know you're responsible enough, I don't trust the people there. Who knows who a person can be what? I'm done talking about this, you're not going and I made my decision."

You huffed out in annoyance, knowing you weren't going to win this argument, so you stomped back into your room, Jack following your trail. Now you were on to plan b which was sneaking out.

ஓ๑♥๑ஓ

You hated how you had to lie to Jack, but you knew he wouldn't let you out either, seeing how often he worries about you as well.

The last time you went out when you weren't supposed to, Jack put two fingers on your forehead and knocked you out. So you knew this time wouldn't be any different.

Being as discreet as you possibly could, you slowly escaped the bunker doors and proceeded to walk towards Lexi's house. Luckily, her house wasn't too far from yours.

Once you arrived, lights and music boomed through the doors. Lexi greeted you as she was drunk and you smiled at her seeing her true side.

You gulped down a couple of shots and stood against the wall, taking in the vibes of drunk teenagers. Suddenly a man came up towards you, a sly and douchey smirk plastered on his face.

"Hey, hottie, what's a gorgeous woman like you doing all alone? And a better question, why are you not with me?" You rolled your eyes at him and attempted to walk away, but he grabbed your wrist tightly.

"I didn't say you could walk away, baby." He started to walk closer towards your body, your personal space definitely invaded. Now you were done. You put your drink down and grabbed his wrist, twisting it making him scream in agony.

You could have easily broken his arm, but you didn't want to make a big scene. "Touch me again, and you will regret it." He had a petrified look on his face and put up his hands in surrender, but you knew he was still a massive dick.

Unfortunately, when you put your drink down, you weren't paying attention enough to notice that your drink was spiked.

You took a couple sips of your drink and you felt free, but the sudden feeling of dizziness overwhelmed your body, blackness filling your vision.

ஓ๑♥๑ஓ

When you gained consciousness once more, you noticed the music wasn't blaring and the setting changed. You were now in an empty warehouse, rust on the walls and live wire lamps.

"Well, well, who knew the youngest Winchester would have her life ended by going to a teenage party." You glared at the man, not sure what he was, but then he blinked, his eyes turning black, now evident he was a demon.

"Son of a bitch, let me go." You said weakly, the drugs still having an effect on you. He just smiled evilly and closed the door, leaving you alone.

You took this opportunity to pray to Jack, hoping he was awake to hear your prayer.

"Jack, baby, if you're hearing this, I n-need help."

ஓ๑♥๑ஓ

When Jack heard your prayer, he sprinted to your room, waking up Sam and Dean, Castiel already being awake considering he doesn't sleep.

When he saw you weren't in your room, fear and anger started to overcome his body.

"Jack, what's wrong, "Castiel asked, the two older Winchester's alerted while walking out of their room.

"Y/n sent me a prayer, something wrong and she's not in her room." Jack then closed his eyes and focused on you. He saw your distressed state and to say he was angry was an understatement. His eyes started to glow gold and his body was shaking in anger.

Being so angry that you were in trouble and somebody is hurting you, Jack didn't even say another word as he used his wings and teleported to your location. His rage was still fuming through his body as he saw the demon holding a knife and walking towards you.

Not hesitating, Jack reached out his arm as golden circles filled the room, instantly killing the other demons.

Once he saw the perpetrators were dead, Jack saw the sight of you and his eyes blinked back to blue.

"Y/n!" Jack ran to your side and broke the chains off of your body easily. He instantly pulled you into a hug and you didn't hesitate to show your tears as you desperately needed comfort from your boyfriend.

"I'm sorry Jack, I shouldn't have left," you sobbed into his shoulder. He gently kissed your head, the feeling of his warmth comforting you.

"Don't worry, Y/n, you're okay. How about we go home and watch that one internet service...what was it called..N-N-"

"You mean Netflix?" You said with a stifled laugh.

"Yeah! Let's watch Netflix." You nodded your head and Jack teleported back to the bunker, relief filling your body.

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓